Limerick Poems
#limerick
Limerick poems, humorous and cheeky five line verses with a strict AABBA rhyme scheme. The first, second and fifth line rhyme, while the third and fourth lines are shorter and share a different rhyme. A limerick is a folk poetry form popular in the 19th century, typically naughty or obscene, and setting out to violate taboos.
Bluevelvete
Poem Published
15th Oct 2020 5:23pm
15th Oct 2020 5:23pm
... licked with a twist..
Littlest languid Lilith,
wickedly and languidly lied
while wickedly languidly licking lollipops
laboriously and languidly licking
while simultaneously
languidly licking and lying
littlest languid Lilith
languidly licked until the
wickedly languidly licked lies
licked littlest languid Lilith
likely she was languidly licked to demise
wickedly and languidly lied
while wickedly languidly licking lollipops
laboriously and languidly licking
while simultaneously
languidly licking and lying
littlest languid Lilith
languidly licked until the
wickedly languidly licked lies
licked littlest languid Lilith
likely she was languidly licked to demise
#lies
#food
#limerick #funny
#limerick #funny
51 reads
10 Comments
Ely
E.A.Rothwell
E.A.Rothwell
Poem Published
11th Oct 2020 6:33pm
11th Oct 2020 6:33pm
Rude Limerick
We're stuck with a POTUS named Trump.
who decided he needed to dump
by the side of the road he
proceeds to unload the
monstrous full moons of his rump...
who decided he needed to dump
by the side of the road he
proceeds to unload the
monstrous full moons of his rump...
#politics
#limerick
33 reads
4 Comments
Insiderew
rew
rew
Poem Published
29th Sep 2020 5:50pm
29th Sep 2020 5:50pm
a limerick
#limerick
31 reads
0 Comments
Ely
E.A.Rothwell
E.A.Rothwell
Poem Published
15th Sep 2020 1:15am
15th Sep 2020 1:15am
There once was a president
There once was a president
who covered his crown with a tent
made from his own hair
stuck down with great care
He forces the fleas to pay rent
who covered his crown with a tent
made from his own hair
stuck down with great care
He forces the fleas to pay rent
#lies
#limerick
#hypocrisy
46 reads
2 Comments
missjem56
Poem Published
7th Sep 2020 5:42pm
7th Sep 2020 5:42pm
"JUST NOT CRICKET!"
There once was a man, John Tricket
Whom had trouble holding on to his wicket
He found a large lump
Which he mistook for his stump
And didn't quite know where to stick it!
Whom had trouble holding on to his wicket
He found a large lump
Which he mistook for his stump
And didn't quite know where to stick it!
#limerick
#funny
#sports
27 reads
0 Comments
LostViking
Lost Viking
Lost Viking
Poem Published
22nd Jun 2020 11:20am
22nd Jun 2020 11:20am
Gardening in Jenny
She answered the phone with, “Hello.”
“Is this my young Jenny the whore?”
“Why, yes this is me
Would you like to come see?
Like you, I can take on some more.”
“I’m coming to see you right now.
Gonna break your soft ground with my plow.”
I’ll drop in my seeds
And play in your weeds
Then get myself back on the prowl.
“Is this my young Jenny the whore?”
“Why, yes this is me
Would you like to come see?
Like you, I can take on some more.”
“I’m coming to see you right now.
Gonna break your soft ground with my plow.”
I’ll drop in my seeds
And play in your weeds
Then get myself back on the prowl.
#sex
#erotic
#limerick
140 reads
3 Comments
Self_helpDarling
Poem Published
17th May 2020 3:26am
17th May 2020 3:26am
Priorities
I lay splayed on this rubber bed
The wax it is melted then spread
And ripped from my skin
With a flick of the wrist
My pussy left soft and red
The wax it is melted then spread
And ripped from my skin
With a flick of the wrist
My pussy left soft and red
#women
#rhyming
#limerick
102 reads
4 Comments
ReggiePoet
Reggie
Reggie
Poem Published
5th Apr 2020 4:21am
5th Apr 2020 4:21am
Third Base
From the day of my birth, as a noob
I was keenly aware of their boobs
But as I grew older
My interest dropped lower
And now, I’m obsessed with their pubes!
As a youngster, my neighbor next door
Hiked her skirt up, and pulled down her drawers
Confused, I asked where
She was hiding her pair
And I made her get down on all fours
Then I probed and I prodded her ass
As I searched for some masculine mass
But no penis was found
And no balls were around
Still confused, I exclaimed, “Not so fast!”
“I think you...
I was keenly aware of their boobs
But as I grew older
My interest dropped lower
And now, I’m obsessed with their pubes!
As a youngster, my neighbor next door
Hiked her skirt up, and pulled down her drawers
Confused, I asked where
She was hiding her pair
And I made her get down on all fours
Then I probed and I prodded her ass
As I searched for some masculine mass
But no penis was found
And no balls were around
Still confused, I exclaimed, “Not so fast!”
“I think you...
#childhood
#BDSM
#limerick
161 reads
3 Comments
RexDurkin
Poem Published
23rd Mar 2020 00:46am
23rd Mar 2020 00:46am
The Chinese Virus
In the Wuhan wet market scene
Where bats are considered cuisine
There came a disease
Thanks to the Chinese
The deadly covid-19
There is no known vaccine
So keep your hands nice n’ clean
And don't touch your face
In case there's a trace
On your fingers of covid-19
It’s more infectious than Charlie Sheen
More invasive than Harvey Weinstein
So self isolate
To slow down the rate
Of the spread of covid-19
Who’d ever thought that poor hygiene
Could crash the economic machine
Now...
Where bats are considered cuisine
There came a disease
Thanks to the Chinese
The deadly covid-19
There is no known vaccine
So keep your hands nice n’ clean
And don't touch your face
In case there's a trace
On your fingers of covid-19
It’s more infectious than Charlie Sheen
More invasive than Harvey Weinstein
So self isolate
To slow down the rate
Of the spread of covid-19
Who’d ever thought that poor hygiene
Could crash the economic machine
Now...
#war
#limerick
#funny
#illness
#pandemic
200 reads
4 Comments
Jade-Pandora
jade tiger
jade tiger
Poem Published
21st Feb 2020 3:53am
21st Feb 2020 3:53am
Was It The Dublin Coddle
( going out on a Limerick )
There once was a copper named Bart
‘Twas famous the way he could fart,
Locals thought it obscene
How he’d pile on the beans,
The crowd all said ‘He must be smart!’
He seemed to be bless’d from the start
Bart turned pooting into an art,
So on St Paddy’s Day
We were happy and gay,
A party there’d be a la carte.
The town planners made it a gift
And foot the bill due to the thrift,
All the ladies would make
Shepherd’s pie,...
There once was a copper named Bart
‘Twas famous the way he could fart,
Locals thought it obscene
How he’d pile on the beans,
The crowd all said ‘He must be smart!’
He seemed to be bless’d from the start
Bart turned pooting into an art,
So on St Paddy’s Day
We were happy and gay,
A party there’d be a la carte.
The town planners made it a gift
And foot the bill due to the thrift,
All the ladies would make
Shepherd’s pie,...
#food
#limerick
#funny
#culture
#tradition
217 reads
20 Comments
Kinkpoet
Poem Published
18th Feb 2020 1:55am
18th Feb 2020 1:55am
CunFronted
#limerick
#funny
#dirty
411 reads
5 Comments
Kinkpoet
Poem Published
17th Feb 2020 2:25pm
17th Feb 2020 2:25pm
Sex On The Brain
#BDSM
#limerick
#funny
542 reads
6 Comments
DU Poetry : Limerick Poems
