Lost.

You don't know these feelings i had for you,
These feelings i still have for you.
They will never change.
You think that i can get better, but maybe i didn't want better.
Maybe i was happy living my life with you.
I was a s perfect to you as i could be.
At times i couldn't be happy because i just got jealous.
Jealous that i hardly got time to be with you, And
You were with you friends.
I know the way you are is another reason i didn't say anything but,
I don't think you realise i was hurting.
You know how you want to be someone your not.
And i promised to help you change,
I am keeping to my promise.
But if you wanted to be the way you want to be,
I treated you like one.
Thats why i got so jealous i treat you like the boy you want to be,
But i guess in your head you didnt realise it hurt.
Being jealous is a natural thing.
Some people choose to hide it.
I'm writting this to say i couldn't keep holding it in.

I'm sorry it had to be like this,
I blame myself.
You reackon I'm to good for you.
Well its not true.
I can't believe all this has just happened,
so fast,
Didn't think being heart broken would hurt this much,
I've been heart broken before,
But because i was so in love with you and so attached,
It hurt so much.
It feels like someone has stabbed me in the heart with a knife,
Sat there for a while and slowly twisted it,
Then slowly taking it out,
All that time ten.
It hurts.
My heart will always belong to you.
But i guess i just have to try and move on don't I.
It's really the only thing i can do.

I hope you have a good life,
Have fun.
Hope you find someone who makes you feel good about your self,
Helps you get threw the tough times.
I will always be here for you as a friend.

I hope that in the future,
You will realise how much you truly did mean to me.
I never hurt you,
I wanted you to be happy thats all that mattered.
Thats all that matters.

Please don't hate me if you read this.
It's what i feel i have to write it down.
I can't keep it all in side anymore.
I will end up doing something stupid.

You mean the world to me,
Now and always.
I will miss what we had.
I love you with everything i got.

Stay in contact please don't ever lose me as a friend.
I don't know what i would do if i lost you all together.
I want you to be in my life.

Love always Boo. <3
P.S - I had the best 5 months of my life with you i couldn't have been any more happier then what i was with you.