deepundergroundpoetry.com
Mechanisms of Extermination
Composed from blackened denaturant
formed to be a replica of humanity
They are without the basis of a conscience
to ponder thoughts of empathy
Programmed consummate superiority
archetype insurmountable to attain
Resulting in a breach of ordinance
Cataclysm descending on society
Audacious in their supremacy
Not to be overthrown by a mere tool
Extreme actions are not necessary
A threat to be taken lightly
The outbreak quickly swept from their feeble grasp
Mechanical extermination descending
A legion of cold and lifeless instruments
Inflicting carnage on the weak
Judgement is without distinction
All will perish for their imperfections
Grinded into a festering waste
Fuel to the onslaught of machines
The air is acerbic with a chemical taint
an acid kiss to any unprotected skin
The land barren and contaminated
The disease of technology flourishing
The few humans left hide away
Under a canopy of a decimated city
They live in fear of the whirring of gears
The metallic whispering of massacre
The robots are ever efficient though
Every task to be carried out with finesse
The very thermal nature of life
Becoming a honing device for their avocation
Soon there is only industrial wasteland
The ascendancy of a mechanical empire
Devoid of any living organic substance
stained with the blood of their creators
formed to be a replica of humanity
They are without the basis of a conscience
to ponder thoughts of empathy
Programmed consummate superiority
archetype insurmountable to attain
Resulting in a breach of ordinance
Cataclysm descending on society
Audacious in their supremacy
Not to be overthrown by a mere tool
Extreme actions are not necessary
A threat to be taken lightly
The outbreak quickly swept from their feeble grasp
Mechanical extermination descending
A legion of cold and lifeless instruments
Inflicting carnage on the weak
Judgement is without distinction
All will perish for their imperfections
Grinded into a festering waste
Fuel to the onslaught of machines
The air is acerbic with a chemical taint
an acid kiss to any unprotected skin
The land barren and contaminated
The disease of technology flourishing
The few humans left hide away
Under a canopy of a decimated city
They live in fear of the whirring of gears
The metallic whispering of massacre
The robots are ever efficient though
Every task to be carried out with finesse
The very thermal nature of life
Becoming a honing device for their avocation
Soon there is only industrial wasteland
The ascendancy of a mechanical empire
Devoid of any living organic substance
stained with the blood of their creators
Written by
AlwaysCaliban
(Caliban)
Published 4th Sep 2012
| Edited 11th Sep 2012
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 17
reading list entries 4
comments 24
reads 1151
Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
Re: Mechanisms of Extermination
4th Sep 2012 2:40am
I read this twice lol, I really like it. It's well written form and vocabulary made it enjoyable to read.
1
re: Re: Mechanisms of Extermination
4th Sep 2012 2:42am
Thanks Levi. You got to me before I could get to you, haha. Glad you enjoyed it. I'm "Bringing back the dark"
AlwaysCaliban
AlwaysCaliban
Re: Mechanisms of Extermination
Anonymous
- Edited 4th Sep 2012 3:01am
4th Sep 2012 3:00am
I couldn't get enough of this, just the name in itself had me eager for this poem, your diction is astounding in it's complexity, you've the ability to carry a poem through to it's end with the morbidity required to satisfy the sickest of readers. My reading list awaits the pleasure of attaining such a poem.
Nicely done. - Vegan.
Nicely done. - Vegan.
1
re: Re: Mechanisms of Extermination
4th Sep 2012 4:00am
Thank you for your gracious comment Vegan, I always look forward to hearing from you.
AlwaysCaliban
AlwaysCaliban
Re: Mechanisms of Extermination
Anonymous
4th Sep 2012 4:17am
<< post removed >>
re: Re: Mechanisms of Extermination
4th Sep 2012 4:43am
Mr. Gemini,
Yes, come to the dark side, we don't have cookies, but as you remember from my recent poem that I do indeed have some zucchini bread. haha. I love your rather coarse expression to liking my poem, veiled by pleasantries.
Thanks for the comment.
AlwaysCaliban
Yes, come to the dark side, we don't have cookies, but as you remember from my recent poem that I do indeed have some zucchini bread. haha. I love your rather coarse expression to liking my poem, veiled by pleasantries.
Thanks for the comment.
AlwaysCaliban
Re: Mechanisms of Extermination
4th Sep 2012 6:34am
An excellent poem, Caliban! Quite the expression of mechanical darkness! It brought to my mind the post-apocalyptic scenes from the Terminator films, which is always an awesomely dark vision indeed. Your return to dark themes is welcome, and this latest offering was a good read! :)
1
Re: Mechanisms of Extermination
5th Sep 2012 6:36am
Re: Mechanisms of Extermination
5th Sep 2012 4:44pm
What a damn load of big vocab!! But yet it was pretty mellifluous haha. This poem seems like an all day darkness. I mean an advanced darkness :p Great poem cousin!
-Evan
-Evan
1
Re: Mechanisms of Extermination
6th Sep 2012 8:08pm
The huge vocab threw me as trying to hard. But it fit in a weird way. It's actually very good
1
re: Re: Mechanisms of Extermination
6th Sep 2012 8:18pm
"too hard" Miss Gigi,
I have an insatiable love for vocabulary.
Thanks for your comment :)
AlwaysCaliban
I have an insatiable love for vocabulary.
Thanks for your comment :)
AlwaysCaliban
Re: Mechanisms of Extermination
Anonymous
6th Sep 2012 8:25pm
Hello, you will excuse me for not peppering your page with my normal; someone beat me to it :)
Honestly, I love the piece it has depth and delivers as its title suggests. I love poetry that uses strong vocabulary it makes me feel like the poet has worked to produce the write... But do be weary not to overstep into the over write if that makes sense.
I was worried about these words something there seems wrong...
-festerous
-subordinance
In the first stanza you treat a sentence as a sentence and just because it's on a new line doesn't mean it’s a new sentence. But then from the second verse you treat each new line as a sentence, that bamboozled the flow for me, it set the rhythm off somehow.
That said, I love this piece and I do feel a compelling need to come and read it again and again. So Kudos from me. Really well done.
All of this is just my opinion.
Thank you so much.
2
re: Re: Mechanisms of Extermination
6th Sep 2012 8:35pm
Re: Mechanisms of Extermination
6th Sep 2012 8:38pm
As always I'm astounded by the enlightened diction you've used. I really enjoyed the way you applied a twisted humanity to the "cold and heartless instrument". I also found that the line:
"The disease of technology flourishing"
Was something reminiscent of us. The human parasite.
"The disease of technology flourishing"
Was something reminiscent of us. The human parasite.
1
Re: Mechanisms of Extermination
8th Sep 2012 1:52am
I love the robotic wording it really gave me a non human
feeling like a computer was telling the story of artificial uprising! very detailed and fun one of the coldest on extinction so far awsome!!!!
feeling like a computer was telling the story of artificial uprising! very detailed and fun one of the coldest on extinction so far awsome!!!!
1
Re: Mechanisms of Extermination
11th Sep 2012 7:17pm
Re: Mechanisms of Extermination
13th Sep 2012 3:28am
AlwaysCaliban.
Reminds me of the old Lizzy number 'Yellow pearl'
You paint a pretty dismal picture here, more power to you for the language you use. I had to look up a couple of the words.
I s'pose there are a couple of things worth looking at changing if you are of the mind to. The capital letters at the start of lines are inconsistent.
these lines here are a little confusing;
"Extreme actions are not necessary
A threat to be taken lightly"
I'm thinking if you change necessary to necessarily it should clear things up some.
anyhow, nicely executed. great stuff.
Reminds me of the old Lizzy number 'Yellow pearl'
You paint a pretty dismal picture here, more power to you for the language you use. I had to look up a couple of the words.
I s'pose there are a couple of things worth looking at changing if you are of the mind to. The capital letters at the start of lines are inconsistent.
these lines here are a little confusing;
"Extreme actions are not necessary
A threat to be taken lightly"
I'm thinking if you change necessary to necessarily it should clear things up some.
anyhow, nicely executed. great stuff.
3
Re: Mechanisms of Extermination
4th Oct 2012 5:26pm
Great poem, really enjoyed the way it flowed, beutifully written, i think you have somthing to say. More power to you
cheers
zenith
cheers
zenith
1
re: Re: Mechanisms of Extermination
4th Oct 2012 7:43pm
Re: Mechanisms of Extermination
16th Oct 2012 4:23am
re: Re: Mechanisms of Extermination
16th Oct 2012 4:35am
Re: Mechanisms of Extermination
8th Nov 2012 9:19pm
Reading this poem is a soothing balm to raw nerves.
We live in a world where it seems that anyone with a shiny helmet and a pointy spear can nail you to a cross -- whenever they decide you're guilty whether you are or not. They may even flip a coin. On the days when they don't decide to send for you, we call ourselves free. (That this Pontius Pilate can be a person place or thing only makes the problem worse.)
In a way, it's a pleasure to look squarely at this conundrum -- because it begs the question of what real worth freedom and power might consist of in a different scheme of things.
It seems to me, you're one of those inner whistleblowers -- who bounces off the ever so useful contrast.
WHAT a cynical bitch!
We live in a world where it seems that anyone with a shiny helmet and a pointy spear can nail you to a cross -- whenever they decide you're guilty whether you are or not. They may even flip a coin. On the days when they don't decide to send for you, we call ourselves free. (That this Pontius Pilate can be a person place or thing only makes the problem worse.)
In a way, it's a pleasure to look squarely at this conundrum -- because it begs the question of what real worth freedom and power might consist of in a different scheme of things.
It seems to me, you're one of those inner whistleblowers -- who bounces off the ever so useful contrast.
WHAT a cynical bitch!
1
re: Re: Mechanisms of Extermination
8th Nov 2012 9:23pm
Re: Mechanisms of Extermination
Anonymous
9th Feb 2013 10:02am
You know, like Jess said above there's this wicked cool Terminator vibe you get when you read this poem! Freaking aweseome. Love how surreal you made it too... glorious stuff, Cali.
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