The Pain

The reality is I'm far from perfection a dysfunctional individual at best a lost cause without correction
Aiming to keep a balance throughout the progression I live with the best of intentions trying to differ the reality from the common deception but to tell you the truth I can't help but question my lifes direction
At a standstill can't seem to find the way over the brick wall at the top of the hill confused and dazed feeling once again misplaced without a reason to keep up the current pace
Love has such a bitter taste in my past the feeling never seems to last its led to a sour stomach yet I aint a fool I know theres no point in trying to rise above it
Still young barely nineteen in its pursuit like a fiend stuck in between rehab and my next fix I apologize to all the females destined to be added to the mismatched list
Hard to coexist with the rest of population constantly stressed because I'm an abstract creation battered down and bruised by the worlds views
The outcome is easily seen another insecure teen dealing with the standards set in place at the end of the race I want to know I was more than just the competition living a life far from being considered a similar repetition
A rebel seeking his cause is the only definition my heart projects
A fucken reject speaking a hieroglyphic dialect often making the left turns just to learn from the burns
A ticking time bomb waiting my turn to be as free as a bird I'm tired of being the black sheep in the herd
Held in a strangle by a couple of words synonymous for being easily misunderstood standing at the crossroads between connection and rejection
I opted to be your forgotten selection its hard being sincere when the picture isn't visibly clear even harder to get near when there's an ocean of fear keeping the distance
Once again questioning my existence here a fucken perseverance of the mind and soul this life is taking its toll
The answers don't reside at the end of the soothing smoke it does aide the reasons to continue to keep hope
At times aligned and intertwined with what you label a useless find its not a dependence its the feelings of acceptance that comes from being lost in the irrelevance if you can't agree it doesnt diminish the reasons I continue breathe the explanation is without need I will continue to proceed till I lose the will to keep a beat without filling your need for reasonable justification because to tell you the truth you can't understand these days of desperation.