unrequited

Your affections
are a one night stand
with unrequited love
you talk a big game, babe
but you disappear
like a post-fuck smoke
leaving nothing but memories
and the scent of you behind

I fuck myself into dreams of you
wake up with a sex toy between my legs
and the disappointment of being alone

No scalding hot shower has ever
washed away the lingering heat inside
but I still try
a pointless punishment
that leaves me wet
in too many ways

I half wish you'd never
whispered those dirty nothings
into my psyche
where they've fermented
and turned whispers into wine

I don't love you
I don't love you
I don't love

I fuck myself to your name