deepundergroundpoetry.com
No Church Bells
We need to talk
Why do I feel my chest tighten or, like every nerve ending is firing at once
We need to talk
Nothing ever goes well with those types of words
I know what I told you
I should stop this. I know exactly where it's going, and my heart is slowly ripping apart.
I told you everything was over with me and her, but I also told you I would try to make it work.
Why is he still talking? I got it. I'm gone
I would like if we could still be friends
He would like it if we could still be friends. Were we ever really friends to begin with? Now he's looking away because I can't look away
He walks me down the hall as if I was being walked to the chair
I just thought it would be best that I told you in person and not over the phone
He's still talking, and I'm dying
Do you understand where I'm coming from? You would do the same, wouldn't you? If you had a chance to.
What? If I had a chance to do it? He was my chance. Does he not see that?
I don't know why I'm trying, but I know it's not going to work. Maybe if you just wait
Now he wants me to wait. What? I'm already dead. There are only so many times when you have this kind of talk in a person's life.
He must think I'm strong because I don't cry. He doesn't understand corpses have no tears. All he did was put the nail in the coffin and help them put me in the ground as we talked.
Why do I feel my chest tighten or, like every nerve ending is firing at once
We need to talk
Nothing ever goes well with those types of words
I know what I told you
I should stop this. I know exactly where it's going, and my heart is slowly ripping apart.
I told you everything was over with me and her, but I also told you I would try to make it work.
Why is he still talking? I got it. I'm gone
I would like if we could still be friends
He would like it if we could still be friends. Were we ever really friends to begin with? Now he's looking away because I can't look away
He walks me down the hall as if I was being walked to the chair
I just thought it would be best that I told you in person and not over the phone
He's still talking, and I'm dying
Do you understand where I'm coming from? You would do the same, wouldn't you? If you had a chance to.
What? If I had a chance to do it? He was my chance. Does he not see that?
I don't know why I'm trying, but I know it's not going to work. Maybe if you just wait
Now he wants me to wait. What? I'm already dead. There are only so many times when you have this kind of talk in a person's life.
He must think I'm strong because I don't cry. He doesn't understand corpses have no tears. All he did was put the nail in the coffin and help them put me in the ground as we talked.
Written by
fianaturie8
(Fia Naturie)
Published 14th Nov 2024
| Edited 15th Nov 2024
Author's Note
This is musing after hearing Church Bells by Etta James
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 16
reading list entries 3
comments 26
reads 265
Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
Re. No Chruch Bells
14th Nov 2024 11:16pm
I like this Fia. Cool concept and the wording is great. Nicely executed.
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Re: Re. No Chruch Bells
14th Nov 2024 11:17pm
Re. No Chruch Bells
14th Nov 2024 11:57pm
I like the way this is written, The thoughts sound authentic.
It's also pretty cruel to do that then say, maybe just wait. As if they want thier cake and to eat it. That's a massive dick move, worse if you were really attached to them.
It's also pretty cruel to do that then say, maybe just wait. As if they want thier cake and to eat it. That's a massive dick move, worse if you were really attached to them.
0
Re: Re. No Chruch Bells
15th Nov 2024 00:02am
Thank you for reading and commenting, I agree with that statement. It is cruel.
Re. No Chruch Bells
15th Nov 2024 00:32am
hello beautiful Fia I can't help but think it's not over to me he seems to be desiring even more control this is painful they never just come out and say that though... they do stuff like this...sometimes causing you to take greater steps to please... great write ❤️
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Re: Re. No Chruch Bells
15th Nov 2024 00:35am
Re. No Chruch Bells
This is a very REAL conversation that has probably transpired
a million times. You really did a great job with the conflicting emotions.
I hope it's fiction.
a million times. You really did a great job with the conflicting emotions.
I hope it's fiction.
0
Re: Re. No Chruch Bells
15th Nov 2024 1:41am
Re. No Chruch Bells
15th Nov 2024 3:12am
Brilliant write, Fia. I liked this a lot. You misspelled church in the title. Etta James, huh? Pulling out the classics on us. Appreciate you.
DL
DL
0
Re: Re. No Chruch Bells
15th Nov 2024 3:14am
Re. No Church Bells
15th Nov 2024 10:56am
People break up and ask to still be friends.
There's no detente when your world is blowing apart....
You did a great job.
Glad it's fiction
LIKE
There's no detente when your world is blowing apart....
You did a great job.
Glad it's fiction
LIKE
0
Re: Re. No Church Bells
15th Nov 2024 11:15am
Re: Re. No Church Bells
15th Nov 2024 12:30pm
Re. No Church Bells
15th Nov 2024 8:10pm
You wait for someone who shows you they care. Not the people that are waiting to use you. Someone else always pops up to take the place of the unworthy ones. Just be patient. Love the message even if it is just about a song.
0
Re: Re. No Church Bells
15th Nov 2024 8:17pm
Re: Re. No Church Bells
15th Nov 2024 9:05pm
Re. No Church Bells
15th Nov 2024 10:27pm
Re: Re. No Church Bells
15th Nov 2024 10:29pm
Re. No Church Bells
15th Nov 2024 11:46pm
Hearing “We need to talk” is like hearing fingernails on a chalkboard!
0
Re: Re. No Church Bells
15th Nov 2024 11:48pm
Re. No Church Bells
17th Nov 2024 11:35pm
He was a fool. Stuck between two amazing women without the slightest clue how to treat either with the level of care and respect they equal deserve.
When a man matures he thinks with his brain in collusion with his heart, a man who has not matured still thinks with his dick, and only succeeds in tearing lives apart.
A sample of a much greater story, and I hope not from actual experience.
Xxx
When a man matures he thinks with his brain in collusion with his heart, a man who has not matured still thinks with his dick, and only succeeds in tearing lives apart.
A sample of a much greater story, and I hope not from actual experience.
Xxx
0
Re: Re. No Church Bells
17th Nov 2024 11:48pm
I would agree that he does not deserve either but life will give him one at least.
Thank you for commenting:)) Dagger
P.S, Answer = No, not from experience
Thank you for commenting:)) Dagger
P.S, Answer = No, not from experience
Re. No Church Bells
Etta James is the real deal! She's been one of my old go-to's for ages. I love bluesy music though. It gets inside ya and doesn't let go easy.
And your write is so exact with the feelings. So many great lines invested within it.
It's superbly written, Fia
(Hey I put this in for poem of the month. It's a great write!)
And your write is so exact with the feelings. So many great lines invested within it.
It's superbly written, Fia
(Hey I put this in for poem of the month. It's a great write!)
0
Re: Re. No Church Bells
18th Nov 2024 2:57am