Alpha b'Tism

Hungry like a pelican,
ṭẏpickle ụḥ'merican,
Hung-Ċ Ḛlegạns
out to do ṣhenạnigans.

Hangin' with my hooligans,
hoopṭy honda hoonigans
went to the mall again
swanġin' capʼn mulligan's.

Bullyin' the paladins,
anglicans and booleans,
saw my cosmopolítan
fit like hula hoodíạṇ!

Hot in a cardigan,
water like ạ culligan,
she's ạ neapolitan
froyo eyes ạ froliċkin'.

Ḟrodọ and I'm followin'
full ỌṖ & flollopin';
tḥinkïng of fallopian-
cowlick and I'm colickin'

like Macaulay caulkïn into
skulk-mode and I'm stalkin'.
In the wall the stall adjacent
I be sprayin' jacksọṇ pollenïn.

Risperdal and ritalin
askin' for a wallopin',
I'm a grade of tardy grin-
blame it all on medicine.

Gunṇa knead an epi pen,
this just ain't ạ happenin';
someone butter call it in,
shakes a tower tall again.