Chapter 9 Home

Chapter 9 Home    
   
As the plane began its descent into Oklahoma City, Brittney felt a heavy weight settle in her chest. The city lights below twinkled below like distant stars. She knew this place well, but it felt foreign after being in Kansas City four days.    
As she closed her laptop thinking of all the learning from those days, she felt a tangled web of guilt and regret.    
   
She had always prided herself on her faith, integrity, and loyalty. She had been raised with strong moral values, waiting until marriage before sharing herself with her husband, Alex. Their relationship had been built on trust, honesty, and unwavering commitment.    
   
But during this conference, she had succumbed to temptation. David, a younger man she met on her flight to Kansas City, captured her attention with his charm and kindness. It started innocently enough, with casual conversations over coffee and shared interests in their field. How could she have been so stupid she thought. She had seen the warning signs for over a year. Then, in a Kansas City hotel, she had crossed a line she never thought she would.  
   
As the plane taxied to the gate, Brittney's mind raced with conflicting thoughts. Should she confess her infidelity to Alex and risk destroying their marriage? Or should she bury her guilt deep down, hoping it would never resurface?  
   
When the plane finally came to a stop and the seatbelt sign turned off, Brittney gathered her belongings and made her way to the exit. Her heart pounded in her chest as she stepped into the bustling airport terminal. And then, she saw Alex.  
   
He was waiting for her near the baggage claim, a warm smile lighting up his face as he caught sight of her. He was the epitome of everything a woman could want in a man - kind, supportive, and endlessly devoted.  
   
"Brittney!" he exclaimed, pulling her into a tight embrace. "I've missed you so much."  
   
Tears pricked at the corners of Brittney's eyes as she wrapped her arms around him, inhaling his familiar scent. In that moment, she knew she couldn't bear to hurt him. He felt so warm and strong!    
   
"I missed you too, Alex," she murmured, her voice catching in her throat. "So much."  
   
They stood there for a moment, clinging to each other as if they were afraid to let go. And in that moment, Brittney decided. She would bury her guilt, bury her transgression, and focus on being the wife and mother Alex deserved.  
   
As they made their way to the car, Alex chattered excitedly about their plans for the week ahead - family dinners, movie nights, and lazy Sunday mornings in bed. And with each word, Brittney felt a pang of guilt twist in her chest.  
   
But she pushed it aside, plastering a smile on her face and nodding along as if everything was perfectly normal.  
   
As Alex navigated the familiar streets towards home, he stole glances at Brittney, his eyes filled with adoration.  
   
"You look tired, sweety," he said, reaching out to squeeze her hand. "Long flight?"  
   
Brittney managed a weak smile. "Yeah, it was a bit exhausting. But seeing you makes it all worth it."  
   
Alex grinned, his eyes crinkling at the corners. "Likewise. You have no idea how much we missed you around here."  
   
Brittney’s stomach cramped and she thought she might throw up. She swallowed hard and took a breath. "I missed you all too. How were the girls while I was away?"  
   
Alex's face lit up with pride. "They were amazing. They kept themselves busy all day, making sure the house was in perfect order for your return."  
   
Brittney's heart clenched at his words. Images of her daughters' smiling faces flashed through her mind.  
   
"That's wonderful," she managed, her voice barely above a whisper. "I'm so lucky to have such good girls."  
   
Alex shot her a concerned glance. "Is everything alright? You seem a bit...off."  
   
Brittney forced a smile, blinking back tears. "I'm fine, just a little tired, that's all. Crazy to think I left the hotel at 11 this morning and now I’m home.”    
   
Alex reached over, gently wiping away a stray tear that had escaped down her cheek. “Was the conference hard? Are there new requirements that will be bad for nursing?”  
   
“Oh, no. It was good training…and networking.” Brittney’s voice trailed back to a whisper.    
   
“Well, we’ll get you some rest tonight. Your mother came over to watch the girls this afternoon. She probably has them tucked in already, but they said they want you to kiss them goodnight and say their prayers.”    
   
“That will be fine,” Brittney said looking at the familiar neighborhood flashing past in the dark.    
   
As they pulled into the driveway, she thought, I’m such a fraud.    
   
“I’ll take care of your suitcase and carryon,” Alex said as they waited for the garage door.    
   
And as she stepped out of the car and followed Alex toward the kitchen, the events of that very morning began to replay in her mind. She’d made love with David the night before and then after they slept together, she gave herself again before her flight. Brittney looked down at her chest remembering David’s hands holding her earlier that day.  
   
Brittney’s mother must have been watching for them because she opened the door as they approached.
   
“Welcome home, young lady,” she said with a broad smile. “You’ve been missed.”  
   
“I hope the girls haven’t been too much trouble,” Brittney said as her mother kissed her cheek.    
   
“No, they were little angels.”  
   
“Your mother made supper for us and we saved some leftovers for you,” Alex said as he carried her. suitcase upstairs to their bedroom.  
   
“Thank you. I forgot to eat today,” Brittney said.  
   
“So much to do when you’re traveling,” her Mother replied.    
   
Brittney sat at the kitchen table and looked at her hands. “Yes, so much was happening.”    
   
Bringing a plate with lima beans and cornbread to the table, Brittney’s mother said, “Oh do tell me about the conference. I’m so proud of you and your work.”    
   
Brittney continued looking at her hands, feeling the irony of her mother’s words. Her work? She’d had an affair, consummating it for the third time that very morning. How could her mother be proud of her? She felt tears coming into her eyes.    
   
“Oh, Brittney, you’re tired,” her mother said when she saw Brittney’s face.    
   
“Yes, I’m tired,” said Brittney as her fingers picked up the cornbread. “I’ll just have a little cornbread. I love your cooking.”  
   
“You do need rest. We’ll tuck you in and I’ll head home. I can come back tomorrow whenever you need me to watch the girls.”  
   
“You can spend the night,” Brittney said around the little glob of cornbread in her mouth.    
   
“I know, but I’ll do some late-night reading and see you tomorrow. The girls enjoyed the park this afternoon and said they wanted to go with you tomorrow.”  
   
Brittney made it to bed before Alex. It seemed so small after her three nights on a king size bed. She entered a half-sleep state and felt Alex’s hand resting on hers. He said, “I love you,” and she knew he had no expectations of her replay, probably thinking she was asleep.    
   
As the sun peeked through their bedroom window, Brittney woke up remembering her last dream. She’d been walking in their back yard and honeysuckle vines began to lock onto her feet. She called to Alex and he pulled her away but the vines left red marks on her ankles.    
   
She sat on the side of the bed and looked at her legs. There were no markings. She went to the bathroom and looked into the mirror. Her hair was a mess. She pulled off her t-shirt, dropped her pajama shorts, and turned toward the shower. As she took a step, she caught a glimpse of her nakedness in the mirror.    
   
She stopped and cupped her breasts as if she were doing a cancer check but she wasn’t. She was remembering David’s hands. Her fingers dropped lower and combed through her light brown pubic hair. She looked down, feeling a mix of guilt and excitement to know that David had been inside of her less than 24-hours before. He’d used protection but their emotions and the frenzied rhythm of their bodies had all been too real.