the darkness only takes bodies not hands

I look around
at all the people I care about
and I see them suffering
and I can't save them
from the darkness
because the only way out
is through
and I'm only
one pair of hands

These days feel like swimming
under a black moonless sky
the shore obscured by waves
and there's water reaching
for my lungs
as I struggle to breathe
and how can I save anyone
when all I think about
is dying
and how I don't really want to
but I'm not sure how to live
in a world that wasn't made
for me

And I want to reach for you
but you look like death
come to ease this passing
and I won't go that easy

So I pretend I'm not drowning
all smiles until you look away
where I know your own smile falters
and I wish I could love you better
but the only way out is through
and if I'm lucky
I'll see you on the side of this
both of us still breathing