The Truth

 
Back back back
I was rolling
get far away
and close to the ocean
Am I  dreaming
I came home screaming
crying like
A boy still trapped in psychosis
I lost everything I had
Went from king to gypsy  
in seconds flat
you hit the bottom man
your bubble bursts and snap
your in a parallel universe zap
Ain’t no simulation
you can’t start
Over
can’t snatch shit you’re gone
A video game
but not in control
 every day I felt like God had my back
then all I felt was demons and black
Just back pack and a Yankees cap
ended up in rehap fast
ultimately I was trying to be
the perfect dad
hold a job and give something back
but the truth is society is fucked
and there ain’t no going back
I’ve seen republicans and democrats
civil war
mothers hitting and lying
fathers and sons fighting
 I ghosted my sister
what kind of big brother does that
 I’m sorry everyone
and yo you said we ain’t compatible
In your Falmouth flat
after I did you like that
I  swear
I’m trying
To be a better human
I’m looking myself in the mirror
I’ve got to get my kids back
I’ve never been a threat
 go tell that to the papers
 I’ve my own truth
There’s nothing left to deliver
 I don’t know who said it first
but there’s no justice it just is
 Witness your country falling to pieces
the world”s on fire my family in taters  
but through it all
I am  someone I admire
I  needed a break
Served in the Navy
now I’m massing an Army
You’ve got to be vulnerable
look at all your strengths
 and weaknesses
give yourself the time
you need to deal with
the trauma and pain
But man it’s inside of me now
I’m back to the routine
the Bald Eagles have returned
you can smoke weed legally
now deep in the pines
Same stink and in an other time
I feel God inside me
more than ever
I am getting strong now
in warrior mode
no more hurt
it’s time to get
Up out of this fucking bed