deepundergroundpoetry.com
Made It To Thursday
No, Elaine.
You can't come in the bathroom.
I've soiled myself.
I told you last year
that you'd never see me like this.
Please, go on to bed
while I clean myself up.
I will then go rest on the couch
and see you in the morning.
The coffee will wake me up.
I promise.
Think of it as practice.
Probably soon,
you'll be sleeping alone for good.
Remember last Friday,
we thought I was a goner.
And the boys came over
when you called them.
I heard y'all, as I woke up.
I love you all too.
In the morning,
we'll have our coffee out back.
Hold hands, and watch the birds
bicker at the feeder.
I will pick out the wives amongst them.
The loudest ones.
I love how you still smile,
at my silliness.
Then I will take a walk
out the back gate.
Cross the creek bed
to the woodline.
Don't argue.
I told you, that's how
I wanted to go.
Let the animals have at me.
I owe them, for all
that I've consumed from them.
I know that you won't allow
such morbidity.
You'll dress me in that gray suit,
that chokes my neck.
I guess I won't be complaining
anymore. About that.
I know that you won't listen.
But don't look at our old pictures.
Just the honeymoon ones.
When our hair was a mess
and our clothes were wrinkled
by the luggage.
And our smile was taken,
and put on that town's postcards.
We laughed at being famous
just a little bit.
My, my, how I was in love
with a star.
Take those old letters down.
I left them on a shelf
that you can reach.
I knew you'd need them
before me.
Go sit in my chair,
and look over at yours.
Where you'd sit for hours,
knitting booties for the boys
and a blanket for me.
The one where you ran out
of blue yarn, and finished it
with yellow.
That one, I kept in the truck,
when the heater quit.
It kept me plenty warm.
But you thought it was because
I decided it was too ugly
for the house.
No, love. It was salvation
for my coldest days.
May as well give our rings to Jacob.
Him and that Maria girl
seem to be doing pretty well.
Maybe they'll wear the rings.
Or sell them, and go
have a grand honeymoon.
I suppose you should bury me
up there by my dad.
Maybe I will find out, somehow,
what he's been up to.
Him and me can compare stories
about when I was a kid.
See if our versions still match.
Maybe it is just dirt.
If I can,
I'll come back and tell you.
Maybe I'll slide my coffee cup
beside yours.
Yes, that's going to be the sign.
Til then, keep saying your prayers, ma.
Maybe it's doing some good.
I think I will go ahead
and make that coffee now.
You sleep in.
I'll come get you when it's ready.
...
Elaine, time to get up honey.
Elaine, coffee's done.
Elaine wake up.
Elaine.
Please, wake up.
Elaine.
~~~
Published 13th Mar 2023
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likes 8
reading list entries 6
comments 21
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Anonymous
13th Mar 2023 2:12am
Whenever the thought of death makes me sad I always try to imagine the face I miss when they get to see the face of Jesus. (You know of my faith)
This was a marvelous write from the deepest portals of the soul. I cannot say enough how much I love it
(Blowing you a hug)
This was a marvelous write from the deepest portals of the soul. I cannot say enough how much I love it
(Blowing you a hug)
13th Mar 2023 2:45am
Thank you, Lady.
I don't knock anyone's religious beliefs. Except the fanatical ones.
Those who follow a proper religion tend to have a decent life. What's not to appreciate about that.
It's a guide to leading a moral lifestyle. I can't argue with the overall results.
I'm glad that you can see the down-home goodness of my write. That is what I was aiming for. In spite of death.
Have a great night, over yonder.
I don't knock anyone's religious beliefs. Except the fanatical ones.
Those who follow a proper religion tend to have a decent life. What's not to appreciate about that.
It's a guide to leading a moral lifestyle. I can't argue with the overall results.
I'm glad that you can see the down-home goodness of my write. That is what I was aiming for. In spite of death.
Have a great night, over yonder.
13th Mar 2023 4:17am
To the very end, you never look away from the raw truth of it. There is an aching beauty that exists at the end of a life experienced, and you’ve fully captured it here. Seriously good stuff.
14th Mar 2023 10:44pm
This is what happens when I read others contributions. I get visions literally playing out in my head, start to finish. This was about twenty minutes of no edit, copying what I'm seeing.
If I don't write them down, they don't go away.
I suck at words. But I'm good with pictures. If that makes sense.
If I don't write them down, they don't go away.
I suck at words. But I'm good with pictures. If that makes sense.
13th Mar 2023 6:09am
14th Mar 2023 10:48pm
Honestly, it was an overwhelming mood that hit me and I wanted to get it in writing while it was impacting me. I was reading some material in this site and this was my result of that.
I'm glad that you see how it fits to "anyman".
Thank you.
I'm glad that you see how it fits to "anyman".
Thank you.
13th Mar 2023 7:54am
Dear S,
Plot twist. The ending was totally unexpected. Reflection has an amazing way of outlining the good times of a lifetime. I really enjoyed the beauty of aging with someone in this write. The sweet details of the blanket and the coffee in this one really grabbed the heartstrings. Beautiful piece. H🌷
Plot twist. The ending was totally unexpected. Reflection has an amazing way of outlining the good times of a lifetime. I really enjoyed the beauty of aging with someone in this write. The sweet details of the blanket and the coffee in this one really grabbed the heartstrings. Beautiful piece. H🌷
14th Mar 2023 10:52pm
The ending was the whole point all along. But I had to get there a bit first. The value is her, through his descriptions. I wanted to keep it as simple things, nothing too over the top.
Thanks H. I kinda had a hard time breathing as I wrote this one. Crazy me.
Thanks H. I kinda had a hard time breathing as I wrote this one. Crazy me.
13th Mar 2023 2:23pm
Fuck, Styx. You've got me crying in a coffee shop. This is just dripping with love, and with lives well lived. So many familiar stories & couples & experiences come to mind, and it reminds me to slow down, treasure it all and stop taking people for granted. I need that.
And then the ending.... well, just... fuck.
Don't ever stop writing.
❤️k
And then the ending.... well, just... fuck.
Don't ever stop writing.
❤️k
14th Mar 2023 10:58pm
Are donuts absorbent? Lol.
No worries dear, I won't stop writing. But, I need a break!
Isn't that ending an ass kicker?! It beat my ass, and I wrote the damn thing!
Sorry (not sorry) about the tears. I hate being emotional alone. Lol.
No worries dear, I won't stop writing. But, I need a break!
Isn't that ending an ass kicker?! It beat my ass, and I wrote the damn thing!
Sorry (not sorry) about the tears. I hate being emotional alone. Lol.
15th Mar 2023 00:18am
Tears over poetry are always good tears. Necessary, even. Happy to join you in the emotional sea any day...
I'll still probably swear at you for it though.
I'll still probably swear at you for it though.
15th Mar 2023 00:27am
13th Mar 2023 2:59pm
Holy balls! My cold dead heart felt something! Styx, that was storytelling magic, the pacing was sublime, and the way you wove out an entire life in a "peek behind the curtain" way.
The way you showed the tender love and care of the narrator leads to the horror of the end. He so loved her, that he made it easy... and then she left.
Fucking brilliant. (sob) I mean... that was good.
14th Mar 2023 11:03pm
No way! I broke through?! A tiny little smidgen of a sliver? Yes!!!!
My job here is done. I shall rest in the luxury of my accomplishment.
My balls aren't exactly holy. But they do feel slightly more lofty. So thank you!
My job here is done. I shall rest in the luxury of my accomplishment.
My balls aren't exactly holy. But they do feel slightly more lofty. So thank you!
13th Mar 2023 5:33pm
This hurts my heart, I love the intimate detail and when understanding arrives at the end, it becomes transformative.
I've one very dear friend that lives overseas. Last week I gave her contact information should we lose touch online, ironically I lost my Wifi service for going on a week now after that, and phone numbers for my brother and sister, so she has someone to confirm I am gone, if I should disappear. So this went into that same room of my heart.
I've one very dear friend that lives overseas. Last week I gave her contact information should we lose touch online, ironically I lost my Wifi service for going on a week now after that, and phone numbers for my brother and sister, so she has someone to confirm I am gone, if I should disappear. So this went into that same room of my heart.
14th Mar 2023 11:11pm
Why would you be even thinking of a "disappearance??? Don't be a schmuck and bail outta here, or anywhere. You have writings to be done. And readers to feed.
I don't write here for free. I do it to get paid back in other people's writings. And kinship.
This isn't a joke. I feed off what I read.
I'm kinda glad that it hurts your heart. It should. It shows your humanity. Empathy.
You're a good guy, Daniel.
I don't write here for free. I do it to get paid back in other people's writings. And kinship.
This isn't a joke. I feed off what I read.
I'm kinda glad that it hurts your heart. It should. It shows your humanity. Empathy.
You're a good guy, Daniel.
15th Mar 2023 8:36pm
Anonymous
13th Mar 2023 6:39pm
Jose wept Styx. You just keep pulling these jaw-dropping words of wonder. Respect.
Death is almost part of life and it has undone me so much in the last 2 1/2 years, I have a constant whirl of eulogies in my head on loop. I'll spare you my idiosyncratic spiritual beliefs, but it's the one journey we will never be able to write about (as someone said). Rob
Death is almost part of life and it has undone me so much in the last 2 1/2 years, I have a constant whirl of eulogies in my head on loop. I'll spare you my idiosyncratic spiritual beliefs, but it's the one journey we will never be able to write about (as someone said). Rob
14th Mar 2023 11:15pm
I get a feeling your spiritual beliefs and mine are similar.
People develop certain ways and then recognize traits in others, because they are familiar with that type of mental journey. How we choose to proceed.
Maybe it is being written, all around us. It's the times of peace that rages our thoughts.
People develop certain ways and then recognize traits in others, because they are familiar with that type of mental journey. How we choose to proceed.
Maybe it is being written, all around us. It's the times of peace that rages our thoughts.
15th Mar 2023 2:03am
15th Mar 2023 2:41am
