grey and green

I lost my fire
in the tempest of your life
maybe that's why
I've come to hate the rain

It wears me down in grey and green
like a sickness that spreads
festers and molds
and sits in my lungs
until I can't breathe anymore

I've never wanted the sun so much
than on the days the sky floods
the earth and I'm trapped inside
restless and broken
and craving a light
the incandescents
can never measure up to
though I christen them mini sols
when the depression burrows deep
and my anxiety makes me
want to step of the roof of a high rise
just to make the scratching in my brain stop

I left the artificial light up my life
and try and forget the world outside
in shades of grey and green
and as persistent as you
on a bad day
when all I needed was sunlight

© Indie Adams 2022