Psalm of fury

What the hell are you doing?
Trying to teach me something?
Am I really such a slow learner?
You take me to such heights
and throw me in such depths
Iím both invincible and crushed
this weight on my shoulders
slowly killing me while making me stronger

Youíve been taunting me.

You lift me so high
to taste glimpses of a world
where I could live powerfully
with my whole heart
sing my fears and my joys
with a forest of songbirds
and be

Only to toss me into a pit
dark with envy and confusion
where the bird songs become screams
wringing blood from my aching brain
like a sponge

Until today,
when I finally ripped out my own heart
in desperation,
to regain control of the beat
I amputated joy
to satisfy you
and your promise of triumph

and damn it, Iím angry
at the futility of
all that Iíve poured myself into
on your account
and how these constant beatings have turned me
from an inspired champion
into a bitter defeatist

I am worn.

Iíve had all the humility I can take
and I donít recognize myself.
Is this what you want?
How does this serve you?
What the hell are you doing?
Written by brokentitanium (k.)
Author's Note

A whole bunch of things. Don't worry, it doesn't make sense to me either.
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
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