earned run

 
i know
that i havent earned the redemption
that i write towards
until rubbed raw

but i know damned well
that i own the right
to say damned.

Well,
this bed ive made
and now lie in

should be a feast
or at the very least
fodder,

for more than just a fanciful frame
around a flame
that has more than earned
its burn

i wish i deserved words like love
or even lust
but no
   only
       loss

and sunk deep in this admittance
ill quick cling to my prize
as beautiful as
sedition  

so now i have to run
    run rampant
    run amok
    run from myself

god knows
ive earned that cliche