Realizing Self

What can be more powerful than realizing self
is it more powerful to be pulled from a shelf
or to pull yourself out by your own means
and two understand what this book cleans
As I pull myself out and dust myself off
dust mingles with mucus as I begin to cough
my eyes start watering as I opened the book
just a little peek just a little look
I don't quite understand what I am trying to say
as I continue to read every single day
There is no warmth except from my hand
As my mind travels to distant land
Maybe I'll understand in the next book or two
why am I always searching for glimpses of you
as I'm reading these words they don't make sense
are they too difficult or am I just dense
the love that I have I have given away
may it return to me some other day
As I close this book and I grab for the next
I hold it close and dear cradled to my chest
maybe the sequel will bring me more joy
or maybe I'm not real am I just a toy
Understand this one reader or all
it was ever my choice and I chose to fall
but as my feet touch earth All the tears that I've cried
Have nourished the trees in which I reside
this lonely soul has some friends indeed
And so it is to Oak and Birch and Bramblewood I heed
Each in turn have grown from my tears
And so protect me for the coming years
They have given me a path in which I walk now
Just in case you were wondering how
This Pagan path laid deep into my heart
will be renewal it will be a new start
Spiraling down and then spiraling back up
that is the love that keeps filling this cup
stronger now than I ever was before
I grow like my trees and have become something more