The Foot Rebellion!

The strangest thing, as if my dreams aren't strange enough? Is that for the last three nights, in a row (ie: consecutive nights!) the bed sock on my right foot, has come off (yes, i wear socks in bed...). the only odd thing about this, is that prior to aforementioned nights, this event has only occurred about 3 times in the last 5 years, and alternated betwixt feet!
Perhaps a rebellious sock fairy, with a penchant for foot (as opposed to foreplay) play with my right foot, and a quirky sense of humour, is responsible for this foul, and odious foot cooling deed! or my right foot is reaching out for freedom, and some form of independence. escaping the confines, and imprisonment of my humble sock, that i force upon it?
What am i to do with a rebellious right foot? when all i'm doing, is trying to protect, and care for it, and keep it warm, the ungrateful little shit! next thing i know, it'll start expecting me to wear sandals, or perish the thought, flipflops! And has my right foot considered the feelings, and needs of my left foot? what's to happen if my left foot wishes to remain in it's current form, and prefers socks, and fab boots?
So if you see me walking down the street, nay, hobbling, with a boot on one foot, and a flipflop on the other, you'll know ive given way to both feet. ironic, in my attempts to satisfy, and create some kind of harmony, that i should end up with a limp. but just as i thought my life was complicated, i witnessed a pirate with a peg leg, hobbling around in a flipflop!
by Jemia