I’M SO DEPRESESD

my girlfriend is taking a nap

i pull up a porn site,

search:

horror clown, alien, tentacle, hideous, trash can, monster, torture, psycho, murder

but nothing’s doing it for me lately…

except

i pull up the most recent video of the male pornstar again, jerking off alone on cam, giving a gun a blowjob, he suicided last week

i donno y this turns me on so much, i’m 100% straight

anyways, i cum on myself

then forget about cleaning it up

i browse the internet

check to see if she’s awake

nope

i buy a bunch of stuff with her credit card

i notice the cum has dried on my chest and stomach

it’s crusty

i pick it out of the hairs

and put it on my desk

i crush it up with her credit card

it looks like cheap cocaine

i notice she’s in bed watching me do this

oh shit

she says wUt the fUck r u doing

i tell her

i got us some cocaine, baby

she grabs a hundred dollar bill from her purse

rolls it up

and snorts a line

then gives me the bill

and i snort a line

omg, i am so high, she says,

this is good shit

me too, i say

i am so depressed