Wreck

I think of myself as a man on a mission. I break my fucking neck cause I'm lost and i know that noose is slippin. Do or die or laugh and cry. My world is chaotic and I know exactly why. Easier that the reasons are said not done. My idea of what isn't yours is fun. I'm like a threat that ain't been made yet. Looking for that one safe money making bet. Never in my weirdest dreams. And never in my life it ever seems. Why me is a question I don't ask anymore. I just except the fact that gods ears are really fucking sore. My addictions that rule and my concepts of what's cool. Destroy my life like a charm as if it's a dyi tool. How the fuck am I supposed to think. When all my ideas are nothing but what I seek. And my idea of who's right and who's wrong. Is like thinking I know the lyrics to that stupid fucking song. I contemplate and negotiate with the personalitys within. I argue with my angels to let the demons in. I confuse reality with what it's not. I think to myself damn I better not. Yet I climb the stairs to reach my chair in my lair of dispair. Only to find myself almost never there. I wish i would only find what I'm looking for. I dream of a day that my pain may pour. Out like a drain and gone with the wind. I think to myself and I avoid looking within. My wife is my life and yet I still fail to be. The husband that's just like the one I wished was me. She deals with it and I hate when she bitches. But not nearly as much as I hate fucking snitches. People make me sick speacially those that play dirty tricks. And judge me please for I need all your energy. Let me see who you really are. I bet your nothing I'm gonna like and Id bet my favorite piece of shit car. I'm not like you motherfucker so don't get it twisted. For all you know I got two loaded AR's and fuck gun control cause I'm double fisted. I don't believe in violence. Unless someone needs to be silenced. My ego is a dirty motherfucker that the cops fear and hate.. So who I may appear to be Is just my fucking ego and what it wants me to fake. This whole world we have all come to know. Needs me like it needs the moon that it controls. Life is short here on Earth. My mission to the cosmos is what it's all worth. Loving my life, hating my strife. Stuck like a car on the tracks and no matter what I can't get the fucker into gear.  Could be worse for I could be you or that son of bitch  that everyone thinks is  weird.  I talk to the dead that hear me shout. I take walks with the souls that couldn't make it out. My days are like yours the same old shit. Just a different week, month and year and a bunch more grit. Lead me not into tempatation, unless your ready for the reasons I enjoy what most are hating. I follow your path just for some excitement and laughs. Why in the fuck can't I rent a hotel room that has a fucking tub slash bath. Showers are cool I guess if it's for you. But I like to relax and soak my broken life as if it was due. I'm a ryhming rambling motherfucking nut. I'm a fucking wreck and fuck it ,so what. I gave you my last dollar so you get something to eat. You laugh in my face as if you think your discreet. I blow your fucking head off cause I told you I would. Fuck it, I'm a wreck and changing it isn't something I would if I could. I dream like you wish your nightmares could be. And here I am still Nothing that I thought as a kid I'd ever be.  

Much love and respect to all those that helped me this far. My wife, My angels, few friends and fans. Peace