deepundergroundpoetry.com
Slim, Black Letters
tires wrapped in cages
ride tenuously along
this icy highway,
white wind howling
against the passenger window
where my head rests
softly in my warmest hat;
my breath escapes,
expanding outward
across the glass
in a heated fog;
I’m suddenly so tempted
to scrawl my name,
slim black letters
against the lacy surface,
raising my finger
with intention
yet, instead returning
the errant hand
to my lap
my mother’s voice -
awfully loud
for not being there
at all -
warns me against
such childish displays,
she hated when I dirtied
her clean windows;
the shrillness of her tone
haunts me
the same way the sound
of squeaky clean glass
sliding against a twin does;
it sits in the back of my throat
and threatens to come out
in a scream -
but I couldn’t then
and I won’t now
I can still hear her sighing,
eyes rolled to heaven,
where her God had forsaken her
to a life with all of me;
stop being so
loud
smart
haughty
silly
sad
talkative
angry
stop being so
much
blinking, I return to my old truck
the dash lit
in a comforting shade of yellow;
my eyes turn obediently
to the path
in front of me -
an automatic thing,
the disconnected submission;
and yeah I’m aware of that,
but there’s comfort found there, too;
I watch the crystalline snow
whip across the road
and my mind conjures
Mr. Attenborough
and his lyrical voice
sliding like honey
along my frazzled nerves,
soothing my frantic energy
as he tells me
about the penguins
and my mouth
turns up it’s corners
as I see them shuffle
fat bellies over flat feet,
making their way across
this barren landscape
ride tenuously along
this icy highway,
white wind howling
against the passenger window
where my head rests
softly in my warmest hat;
my breath escapes,
expanding outward
across the glass
in a heated fog;
I’m suddenly so tempted
to scrawl my name,
slim black letters
against the lacy surface,
raising my finger
with intention
yet, instead returning
the errant hand
to my lap
my mother’s voice -
awfully loud
for not being there
at all -
warns me against
such childish displays,
she hated when I dirtied
her clean windows;
the shrillness of her tone
haunts me
the same way the sound
of squeaky clean glass
sliding against a twin does;
it sits in the back of my throat
and threatens to come out
in a scream -
but I couldn’t then
and I won’t now
I can still hear her sighing,
eyes rolled to heaven,
where her God had forsaken her
to a life with all of me;
stop being so
loud
smart
haughty
silly
sad
talkative
angry
stop being so
much
blinking, I return to my old truck
the dash lit
in a comforting shade of yellow;
my eyes turn obediently
to the path
in front of me -
an automatic thing,
the disconnected submission;
and yeah I’m aware of that,
but there’s comfort found there, too;
I watch the crystalline snow
whip across the road
and my mind conjures
Mr. Attenborough
and his lyrical voice
sliding like honey
along my frazzled nerves,
soothing my frantic energy
as he tells me
about the penguins
and my mouth
turns up it’s corners
as I see them shuffle
fat bellies over flat feet,
making their way across
this barren landscape
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