deepundergroundpoetry.com
Fade
She stands, translucent, on the stair
Radiant smile, and glowing hair
She beckons me to follow her
And my dormant love begins to stir
I follow her down shadowed halls
While she sings, while she calls
That I have nothing left to fear
Each word melodious and clear
We step into a darkened room
But I experience no sense of doom
I revel in my love's sweet breath
And the fading of my dread of death.
Radiant smile, and glowing hair
She beckons me to follow her
And my dormant love begins to stir
I follow her down shadowed halls
While she sings, while she calls
That I have nothing left to fear
Each word melodious and clear
We step into a darkened room
But I experience no sense of doom
I revel in my love's sweet breath
And the fading of my dread of death.
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likes 12
reading list entries 2
comments 12
reads 746
Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
Re: Re. Fade
30th Sep 2019 11:40pm
Re. Fade
Anonymous
30th Sep 2019 11:34pm
Good to see you again my friend. Lovely write. Life and death collide. This spirit must have been very hot to be able to bring you into a dark room and leave you unafraid.
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Re: Re. Fade
30th Sep 2019 11:44pm
This is why I choose to believe in ghosts. It brings some comfort to me, not fear. Thank you J. I will try to materialize here more frequently.
Re. Fade
1st Oct 2019 5:24am
Whoo hoo, Crow is back in the house..it doesn't feel like home without your presence...and your rhymes about the darkness that you treasure as light. I do hope you'll be here more often now. Thinking of & missing you, dear friend! 🖤
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Re. Fade
1st Oct 2019 12:13pm
Re. Fade
1st Oct 2019 6:36pm
Bravo Sir Crow! To not fear death is a feeling I yearn know. I think I've spent a lifetime in fear of that moment. I love the mystery in this piece. I have missed your poetry and camaraderie.
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Re. Fade
1st Oct 2019 9:58pm
Really nice to read you again here Crow. I love the way you always manage to conjure up these short-story encounters and cameos.
Honest critique - I have a couple of suggestions to improve scansion.
St1, line4 - delete "my"
St4, line2 - replace "experience" with 'perceive'
St4, line4 - replace "And the fading of " with 'as fades away'
Best regards, Josh.
Honest critique - I have a couple of suggestions to improve scansion.
St1, line4 - delete "my"
St4, line2 - replace "experience" with 'perceive'
St4, line4 - replace "And the fading of " with 'as fades away'
Best regards, Josh.
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Re. Fade
Anonymous
6th Oct 2019 5:11am
Welcome back Crow......this is enchanting.......your words guided me down the hallway with you......nice visuals.......purple luv & hugs xo :)
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Re. Fade
2nd Nov 2019 5:03am
Good To Read You Again , My Friend...
I have Missed you , and your words , both your poetry and your appreciation...
Blessings and Salutations !
I have Missed you , and your words , both your poetry and your appreciation...
Blessings and Salutations !
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Re. Fade
16th Dec 2019 1:19am
We would lay beneath a shroud if it were welcoming enough, and in that space is the deep comfort and connection of primal intimacy
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