Beyond lost my mind

Beyond lost control..
Beyond lost my mind..
Back to feeling quite confined
Haven't I always though?
Part of it stems from silent seclusion
and I'm finding myself overwhelmed from the tension I sense from my families turmoil..
Disconnection.
Pain.
No love..
I don't really know what's happening.
It's all uncertain
I'm uncertain
I'm clueless in fact
No control
No care
No plan
No goal.
Feeling fully gone and currently cold..
Outcast
The odd one out
immensely introverted,
so isolated yet so free
in this inner youniverse,
all depends on how I feel I guess.
Still there's so much stress
 surrounding our situation which I'm very sensitive about.
I allow myself somehow to
 absorb the anguish too often
and it's too obvious to ignore like before,
impossible to forget but I know I must break through without drowning
in depression..
Any suggestions?