Crying Alone

I used to be bullied for being so dumb
Then at the young age of 12, I learned it was better to be numb
Soon my days
Bled unto a large haze
All my thoughts became synchronized motions
Regular as the beats of the oceans
Till day went away
And blessed night was there to stay
I know it was a sin
But cold metal met skin
My eyes were dry
However red tears I did cry
I knew I was beyond sad
Maybe a bit crazy, or a bit mad
But
Day always brought pain
Soon night was the only thing keeping me sane
Still by day I smiled
But even the best masks must wear away after awhile