deepundergroundpoetry.com
In The Rough
Here I am zoning out again
Knowing what I don’t want to feel
It’s hard to push myself away
Hard to even tell what all is real
I take a deep breath, in and out
Just drop the tone and listen, baby
Not trying to fuss and fight tonight
I’m not trying to come off crazy
I can’t say anything anymore
Without you lashing out
I try to start off really calm
Seconds later you start to shout
So I start to release my grip
I stare into the void of our walls
I barely blink, breathing shallow
The world around me seems to stall
I’m not sure when I come back to
Back to the same ole disassociation
Not sure when I started this mess
But I know that it’s all my creation
I don’t want to feel
I don’t want to see
I can’t stand the noise
What it makes of me
I’m lost in my internal affairs
Don’t want to rock the boat
How long can I keep this up
Can’t even keep myself afloat
Don’t know what I’m doing here
As I stare at my spot on the wall
Eyes are crossed, vision unfocused
Not sure I have fight left in me at all
Published 7th Apr 2019
Author's Note
Super rough draft, don’t even care how imperfect this is.
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 8
reading list entries 1
comments 14
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7th Apr 2019 12:05pm
Wow ... Felt ... Rough or not if it's how you're feeling then it's perfect ... Bless and much love ...
7th Apr 2019 2:29pm
Thank you, FeNyX. Getting off a bad flare up and. Just needed words out there and finally felt some! Thanks for the reads and comments :)
Anonymous
- Edited 21st Oct 2019 5:45am
7th Apr 2019 3:09pm
<< post removed >>
7th Apr 2019 10:17pm
Ah thank you, been feeling super... writer's blocked lately and all of this certainly doesn't help. Thank you for the read and the comment.
24th Apr 2019 5:52pm
I think that logic is that f***king still voice that blasts itself and suggests a myriad of signs, but as time goes on that voice just subsides. It will always beckon again and again. It tries to point the way, to steer us away from dangers ahead.
Been many a time, I did not listen and at 70 have finally kind of sort of learned to listen. To listen is the key, but to hear is the door.
Been many a time, I did not listen and at 70 have finally kind of sort of learned to listen. To listen is the key, but to hear is the door.
7th Apr 2019 4:01pm
7th Apr 2019 10:18pm
Thank you, raw and real is all I had at this time. Thank you for the love and the comments. Its all so greatly appreciated.
Anonymous
- Edited 30th Jan 2023 2:45pm
8th Apr 2019 7:10am
<< post removed >>
23rd Apr 2019 11:24pm
Mm, what a way to not feel! Thank you for the read, the comment and the love, audioharleea❤️
24th Apr 2019 5:55pm
Yes at her young age has great insight. I have no doubt LivDiane will live a life full of joy and pain. It's all about how we react, what we do with it.
Anonymous
- Edited 9th Apr 2019 10:05pm
9th Apr 2019 10:03pm
<< post removed >>
23rd Apr 2019 11:25pm
My writing is where I draw strength :) Thank you for the read, the comment and the love, sepicla_ikn❤️
23rd Apr 2019 11:15pm
23rd Apr 2019 11:25pm
A good note, thank you for the wise advice, CasketSharpe! And thank you for the read, the comment and the love❤️
