The Push and Pull

I wanna live
I wanna die
So much of wanting things
And watching things
In my mind
To be crushed into glass
To be sand
To be anything but who I  am
And I feel hunted
arrow to my heart
If you can catch it in the dark
What does your smile feel like I forget
What does it mean to be with you
I digress
The push and pull
And peaches in the summer too
So much of our time has been spent
In bed
Staring into space
And the spaces of eachother too
I want to cry
I want to smile
So much of wishing for better and wondering
About the old fashioned movies
And if anyone who taught us about love was right
Boy is this all wrong
In my mind