deepundergroundpoetry.com
yeah, i got your note
yeah, i got your note, thanks
who am i talking to...you're gone...long gone...
but, hell, i don't blame you for wanting to run away
from this crummy apartment on the corner of
Ramshackle st. & SucksBigTime blvd. .....
if i took all the good pieces of my past,
stitched them together, i wouldn't have a rag big
enough to blow my nose with
couple drinks'll put me to sleep tonight...
hey, that heart you took with you, just
drop it in the nearest garbage can...
yeah, i got your note,
i nailed it to the cracking wall
so i could blow my brains out with it
every day...
Published 18th Jan 2018
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 27
reading list entries 1
comments 20
reads 3070
Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
18th Jan 2018 9:06am
Cor, deathly Sir. You'll come through, guns blazing. Go steady, writer.
18th Jan 2018 9:30am
dearest John raw real anger & pain here
giving it to us straight up
I taste the despair..
but the poetess above me is right
you'll come through on top sure enough..
love Crim
giving it to us straight up
I taste the despair..
but the poetess above me is right
you'll come through on top sure enough..
love Crim
Anonymous
18th Jan 2018 10:23am
notes/texts/e-mails whispering goodbye are the sign of a true coward. crucify her to the ramparts of her cardboard fortress with your utterly marvellous pen...
18th Jan 2018 3:06pm
That crummy little apartment needed something on the wall anyway,
and the pain of it all let's us know we still exist.
Bang up job, John, as always, a straight shot to the heart...
and the pain of it all let's us know we still exist.
Bang up job, John, as always, a straight shot to the heart...
18th Jan 2018 8:37pm
I'd rather see you play the William Tell Game with whoever sent that note. Tough and excellent work.
Anonymous
- Edited 8th Nov 2018 00:49am
19th Jan 2018 8:38am
<< post removed >>
Anonymous
- Edited 8th Nov 2018 00:49am
19th Jan 2018 9:12am
<< post removed >>
6th Feb 2018 6:44pm
Poetry infiltrates the shadows of the heart as though it has a divine purpose, perhaps designed only for romanticized suffering and for that I am in its merciful grasp.
Striking stimuli, Sir Blues - blue angel
Striking stimuli, Sir Blues - blue angel
13th Mar 2018 3:05am
Anonymous
6th Apr 2018 10:09pm
Gosh what a heart crushing piece, though i'd
rather be honest and say atleast you recieved
a note when some of us never do....
rather be honest and say atleast you recieved
a note when some of us never do....
The aftermath... a time to hollow our insides out and ask ourselves the question... was it tsunami or surimi?
Powerful and blunt! Totally dig the last lines.
Powerful and blunt! Totally dig the last lines.
26th Jun 2018 00:09am
Bang! A beautiful love poem John...the ending subtle and superb man.
Cheers...Harry
Cheers...Harry
Anonymous
- Edited 25th Oct 2022 6:45pm
29th Nov 2018 00:08am
<< post removed >>
Anonymous
- Edited 22nd Feb 2020 11:45am
28th Feb 2019 7:55pm
<< post removed >>
Anonymous
- Edited 21st Oct 2019 5:45am
28th Apr 2019 12:35pm
<< post removed >>
10th Jan 2020 6:27am
4th Jun 2022 00:24am
Hello there, old timer....
I miss those days when you were posting & commenting. It was truly an honor to read your work and receive your feedback. I was so angry & unstable in those days, and didn't realize that I was living through one of the very best times in my life...I do miss those late nights. You were a calm presence through many storms. Now it's my turn to be one of the elders, if all goes well. I certainly was fortunate enough to meet some fine examples, such as yourself. Things are not "worse" these days but they certainly very different..I have actual serious employment in waste management now, and am working on myself in ways I did not back then during my more nihilistic days.
I don't know where you are now but whatever condition you are in I hope you know that you are missed.
I miss those days when you were posting & commenting. It was truly an honor to read your work and receive your feedback. I was so angry & unstable in those days, and didn't realize that I was living through one of the very best times in my life...I do miss those late nights. You were a calm presence through many storms. Now it's my turn to be one of the elders, if all goes well. I certainly was fortunate enough to meet some fine examples, such as yourself. Things are not "worse" these days but they certainly very different..I have actual serious employment in waste management now, and am working on myself in ways I did not back then during my more nihilistic days.
I don't know where you are now but whatever condition you are in I hope you know that you are missed.
6th Jul 2022 1:21am
14th Jan 2023 6:11pm
John it's good to see you were on the site recently. I hope you'll be posting again. Your unique gritty realism and intimate detail is sorely missed.
Anonymous
3rd Sep 2024 6:28pm
What a heartbreaking piece.
