deepundergroundpoetry.com
lobotomy
the cyanide sunrise
snuffed out my optimistic disposition
in the frying pan of realism
while putrid remaining hope
burned on the stove
my skies bled lies
spewed from the unfaithful lips
of a cankerous woman
whose word vomit
puddled around my ankles
in big thick chunks
she turned out to be me
imagine the dismayed moon
to be doing life without
sentenced for my crime
imprisoned with lunatics
at least he's a star there
my blizkrieg of pain
left him in a fallout shelter
headed for the infirmary
where he's going to be lobotomized
so he never has to hear me again
it doesn't take
now he hears me internally
an infernal monologue
that sounds just like Mickey Mouse
he has a hole in his head
that leaks gasoline
I strike a match
set my words on fire
they are forever burned to his brain
Copyright © 2018 Crimsin. All Rights Reserved
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 23
reading list entries 5
comments 48
reads 1051
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The author encourages honest critique.
Re. lobotomy
5th Jan 2018 3:39am
Re: Re. lobotomy
5th Jan 2018 3:45am
Re. lobotomy
5th Jan 2018 4:31am
the cyanide sunrise
snuffed out my optimistic disposition
in the frying pan of realism
imagine the dismayed moon
to be doing life without
sentenced for my crime
Magical metaphors... not sure how you do this,
your pen is supreme !
With deepest admiration
~Wicked
snuffed out my optimistic disposition
in the frying pan of realism
imagine the dismayed moon
to be doing life without
sentenced for my crime
Magical metaphors... not sure how you do this,
your pen is supreme !
With deepest admiration
~Wicked
1
Re: Re. lobotomy
5th Jan 2018 4:51am
thank you graciously dearest Wicked One
this was just free association just whatever flowed I wrote out..
I'm so happy you enjoyed it :)
love Crim
this was just free association just whatever flowed I wrote out..
I'm so happy you enjoyed it :)
love Crim
Re. lobotomy
5th Jan 2018 5:24am
"my skies bled lies
spewed from the unfaithful lips
of a cankerous woman
whose word vomit
puddled around my ankles
in big thick chunks
she turned out to be me "
Such savage imagery .. and wording...
Shocking turn of cause and emotions you fed me..
I stomach your words into inspiration..
<3<3
H
spewed from the unfaithful lips
of a cankerous woman
whose word vomit
puddled around my ankles
in big thick chunks
she turned out to be me "
Such savage imagery .. and wording...
Shocking turn of cause and emotions you fed me..
I stomach your words into inspiration..
<3<3
H
1
Re: Re. lobotomy
5th Jan 2018 5:30am
thank you beautiful Hanuel
I know this is a raw one
with some stomach turning metaphors
happy it may inspire :)
love Crim
I know this is a raw one
with some stomach turning metaphors
happy it may inspire :)
love Crim
Re. lobotomy
5th Jan 2018 6:00am
Re: Re. lobotomy
5th Jan 2018 6:12am
Re. lobotomy
Anonymous
5th Jan 2018 6:02am
"he has a hole in his head
that leaks gasoline
I strike a match
set my words on fire
they are forever burned to his brain "
If only it were easy. Great piece to start off the night my love.
Love you
Beth
that leaks gasoline
I strike a match
set my words on fire
they are forever burned to his brain "
If only it were easy. Great piece to start off the night my love.
Love you
Beth
1
Re: Re. lobotomy
5th Jan 2018 6:13am
thank you graciously beautiful Beth
for such a wonderful comment
making my night brighter :)
love you beautiful..
Brenda
for such a wonderful comment
making my night brighter :)
love you beautiful..
Brenda
Re. lobotomy
5th Jan 2018 6:08am
you lassoed me in with this darkness Crim, though the pain is powerful, such a fucking artist De la...
1
Re: Re. lobotomy
5th Jan 2018 6:14am
thank you graciously dearest Dean
i'm both blushing & beaming from you freaking awesome comment :)
love Crim
i'm both blushing & beaming from you freaking awesome comment :)
love Crim
Re. lobotomy
5th Jan 2018 11:46am
Re: Re. lobotomy
5th Jan 2018 12:07pm
Re: Re. lobotomy
7th Jan 2018 10:24am
beautiful one i'm over the moon
with your awesome comment
your reaction to this write
made my week :)
love you lady..
Brenda
with your awesome comment
your reaction to this write
made my week :)
love you lady..
Brenda
Re: Re. lobotomy
7th Jan 2018 10:24am
Re. lobotomy
5th Jan 2018 12:10pm
Your words wake me from nightmares Crimsin , i Love it.
these cyanide sunrises are just what the doctor ordered.
i'm totally going to read this so many times over lol.
these cyanide sunrises are just what the doctor ordered.
i'm totally going to read this so many times over lol.
1
Re: Re. lobotomy
7th Jan 2018 10:26am
thank you dearest Samael
your style inspired this
I just dig it completely..
love Crim
your style inspired this
I just dig it completely..
love Crim
Re: Re. lobotomy
7th Jan 2018 12:12pm
and you inspire everyone you've touched here on DUP ; you're one of the life sources that keep the blood flowing in this ever growing revolving world of poetry.
1
Re: Re. lobotomy
7th Jan 2018 12:15pm
aw Samael thank you
that is the most beautiful comment
a poetess could hope to get..
i'm blushing wildly & smiling big
you really touched my heart..
love Crim
that is the most beautiful comment
a poetess could hope to get..
i'm blushing wildly & smiling big
you really touched my heart..
love Crim
Re: Re. lobotomy
21st Jan 2018 8:06pm
Re: Re. lobotomy
22nd Jan 2018 3:38am
thank you dearest Samael you inspired me with your style greatly on this i'm so happy you've been coming back to it ;)
love Crim
love Crim
Anonymous
- Edited 30th Jul 2018 7:47am
5th Jan 2018 12:50pm
<< post removed >>
Re: Re. lobotomy
7th Jan 2018 10:27am
thank you graciously John for your great comment
i'm so happy you enjoyed the experience..
love Crim
i'm so happy you enjoyed the experience..
love Crim
Re. lobotomy
Anonymous
5th Jan 2018 2:10pm
Bloody hell, beautiful Dark Angel...this is incredible. The hopelessness and pain in the words, the unbelievable imagery...Take a bow, gorgeous. This was an amazing piece! I do so love you, sweetest
...ever your Willow
...ever your Willow
1
Re: Re. lobotomy
7th Jan 2018 10:29am
thank you beautiful Willow
for feeling the desolation of this write
& for finding beauty in the darkness..
I love you..
Brenda
for feeling the desolation of this write
& for finding beauty in the darkness..
I love you..
Brenda
Re. lobotomy
5th Jan 2018 5:54pm
Re: Re. lobotomy
7th Jan 2018 10:30am
Re. lobotomy
Anonymous
5th Jan 2018 7:19pm
my love, i don't know how you do it...you manage to make my face scrunch and head shake vigorously while at the same time experience tranquility in this darkness...
I love you fiercely
yours always & forever
xoxox love Taryn
I love you fiercely
yours always & forever
xoxox love Taryn
1
Re: Re. lobotomy
7th Jan 2018 10:31am
thank you my love I know this write gave you scrunchy faces but you still found beauty in the dark..
I love you passionately..
love Brenda
I love you passionately..
love Brenda
Re. lobotomy
5th Jan 2018 10:16pm
No one...i mean no one does dark ink like you, Crim! Freaking gorgeous! 😘
1
Re: Re. lobotomy
7th Jan 2018 10:32am
aw Rain thank you lovely one you're too gracious.. i'm humbled & honored by your comment :)
love Brenda
love Brenda
Re. lobotomy
6th Jan 2018 5:14am
I bow to your magic Brenda...and I resent having not written this amazing piece of epic poetry...a TOWER of words my friend.
Cheers...Harry
Cheers...Harry
1
Re: Re. lobotomy
7th Jan 2018 10:40am
aw Harry you're making me blush thank you graciously dear poet,,you honored me deeply with your comment..
love Brenda
love Brenda
Re. lobotomy
6th Jan 2018 4:08pm
"I strike a match/set my words on fire/they are forever burned to his brain" - such a killer closing on this one.
1
Re: Re. lobotomy
7th Jan 2018 10:41am
thank you graciously beautiful Dragonfly
for such a fantastic comment :)
love Crim
for such a fantastic comment :)
love Crim
Re. lobotomy
6th Jan 2018 8:21pm
Grim and powerful work Lady Crim. Those final lines are devastating, but I love the seething quality you bring to it all. And when you strike that match....
1
Re: Re. lobotomy
7th Jan 2018 10:42am
Anonymous
- Edited 30th Jan 2023 2:45pm
7th Jan 2018 3:16am
<< post removed >>
Re: Re. lobotomy
7th Jan 2018 10:44am
thank you graciously beautiful Kat you are so kind a soul to me I deeply appreciate you i'm so happy this poem resonated within you..
love Brenda
love Brenda
Re. lobotomy
7th Jan 2018 4:43am
never has darkness been so poetically beautiful..
damn Crim...you slay the senses...
damn Crim...you slay the senses...
1
Re: Re. lobotomy
7th Jan 2018 10:45am
Re. lobotomy
7th Jan 2018 12:29pm
All of the above, dear Brenda. You've described my worst fear of inescapable asylum in a most brilliant tumble of free flow. Then you stuck the match and I saw a way out.
Much love to you....David
Much love to you....David
1
Re: Re. lobotomy
7th Jan 2018 12:33pm
thank you dearest David
for taking this dark journey with me
& seeing a way out in the end..
I cherish your thoughts..
love Brenda
for taking this dark journey with me
& seeing a way out in the end..
I cherish your thoughts..
love Brenda
Re. lobotomy
9th Jan 2018 1:58am
well, sweet Brenda I am blown away there is always hope - strange that coming from me of all people - I wish for you all good things :-)))))
Love and Hugs :-))))
Love and Hugs :-))))
3
Re: Re. lobotomy
14th Jan 2018 11:24pm
thank you dearest David I love that you are once again embracing hope..
love & hugs..
Brenda
love & hugs..
Brenda
Re. lobotomy
Anonymous
- Edited 21st Jan 2018 6:51am
12th Jan 2018 9:15pm
<< post removed >>
Re: Re. lobotomy
14th Jan 2018 11:26pm
thank you dearest Ghost for viewing my pessimistic write as the realism it sometimes is.. David speaks from a deep knowing of what it is to lose hope..
love Brenda
love Brenda