[88]

This poem was inspired by Marisa in the German film Kriegerin.

A suitably chilling poem full of violence, sadomasochism, and unbridled hate. It ain't pretty, but it's well-written. As for critique, a touch more clarity in the who, what, where, and why might help, but on a purely sensual level this packs a punch. x

I agree, I've stripped this poem back to bare bones with the intention to include it in a collection of short poems, but I remembered your last comment, pointing out that one of my short poems could stand alone... I had the same feeling about [88].

I appreciate the feedback and stoked you felt the punch.

Truly a great write. Your work is amazing.

Thanks Praxis.  I appreciate you dropping by to comment.

I know in the comments you mention this poem was inspired by another film character, but I'm drawn in my mind to the image of Evey in 'V for Vendetta' when she is tested and eventually transformed.

There's something poignant about the phrase "my little fighter" especially as a stand alone statement. This poem is all about the aggressive nature, and yet, is surprisingly tender in places. Skilful description.

This is a fine example of your use of parallel. Thank you for the read.

It's cool you felt the tenderness amongst the hate, because it's  something that the film did very well.  Maybe it's a man thing, but I found something strangely attractive about the female nazi antihero, and it's something I wanted to capture in a tribute to the film.  
 
Thanks heaps for your great feedback and thoughts, Missy.

she presumed to have found her destiny in the old ways: power begets glory.
perhaps there are women somewhere who never fell victim to love...

A woman who never fell victim to love... sounds like the ideal kind of woman, Mr Feddeler.

I loved a skinhead - and this is here in this verisimilitude
when the goods all gone - you'll make do and love the bad in her

Perhaps one can not love with 20-20 vision... or do men make do when their carnal desires are fulfilled? Thanks heaps for your thoughtful comment, whale.

or that which makes us feel most alive

The imagery of the "micro-motion of her lips and tongue" was astounding.
A mouthed oblation long after sound had been crucified.
An reflexive twitching holding onto meaning and life.

Very apt observation, Case. Even more so conveyed.

The film that inspired the poem was confronting and the actress was exceptional in her subtle silent moments.  One of those films that draws you into the minute details.

Thanks for picking up on the micro motion line, Ahavati.  I appreciate the feedback.

another masterpiece - certainly got my grey matter firing and misfiring - if this doesn't make me write anything today nothing else will :-)

I'm stoked if you walked away inspired by this poem, David.  Thanks heaps for the feedback.

the narrative is what I love the most..clearcut, no lingering, no chaos..
minimal words, short verses..spaces..they speak, shapes..magnifies.., questions..
and then there's lot more as you you pack in bloody elaborations in s2, s4

verse 1.."there's something... ah, . this 'something' is sheer poetic cleverness whoever ropes in
'something" is poetic quotient in my term & you bring it on, its intensity intact. ..

and Case..i dunn know if you yourself noticed the wordplays in there...
rhythmic patterns & relativities join hands..I know these lil gems all fall in line by themselves
mostly unaware of creator hectic in the vigor-making..I think am  making sense
" petite masciulinity -pure malice"  'fucks-viscous' 'meditations-micromotions'  more there
..aw, am not petty dissecting what said  in literal pieces here and there.

Noomi Rapace, the dragon tattoo girl made quite an effect on me in the titulatr role..I know
how this scribe would have breen conmceived.

brilliant work, and I need tpo create a separate RL for Case I hope:)
tq for this wonderful share..shine on

There's a lot of wordplay and rhyming techniques used in this short poem, that weren't entirely conscious decisions during the writing process, the technique often works its way into a poem just from the process of writing, reading and rewriting, until the words and flow sound right.    
 
I'm stoked the poem made it on your RL and thanks heaps for your great feedback, Uma.

I've not seen the film, but you clearly get the character across in this piece.  She sounds as fierce as a Jack Russell.  

A powerful last line Alexander and I'm sure this piece will peak my curiosity to look into the movie.

Great writing. :)

It's interesting you suggested Romper Stomper, because I watched Kriegerin (English title: Combat Girls) straight after Russell Crowe... and I have to say, even though the German film was heavily influenced by Romper Stomper, I liked it better for the storyline and the acting... the characters were just as fierce as Russell, but perhaps there was a little less overacting.  
 
Thanks heaps for your great comment, Magdalena.

it's nice.. but i think you used up all the "awesome" in salem. haha

Nice? Not even a "fucking nice?" Thanks man, great to see you loitering round these green walls again.

a picture you paint case

I'm a visual kinda guy. Thanks Kate mate.