deepundergroundpoetry.com
-dead star light
how do I tell you
about the way your very existence
makes my soul come alive
how all those times I'd died before
were worth a chance to find myself lost
in your transcendental eyes...
what would it take
for you to believe
that you could trust
something you had never known;
that I too have felt alone
surrounded by everyone
who had ever said they loved me
and how every hug made me feel
like I was a deserter
because no one could understand
the places I had to go to be myself...
within these words both of us have traveled
over distances that once seemed too far
but would you walk with me a little further
to see what we discover beyond ourselves
like we are light from stars long dead
in search of a place where our souls can shine...
-ed
about the way your very existence
makes my soul come alive
how all those times I'd died before
were worth a chance to find myself lost
in your transcendental eyes...
what would it take
for you to believe
that you could trust
something you had never known;
that I too have felt alone
surrounded by everyone
who had ever said they loved me
and how every hug made me feel
like I was a deserter
because no one could understand
the places I had to go to be myself...
within these words both of us have traveled
over distances that once seemed too far
but would you walk with me a little further
to see what we discover beyond ourselves
like we are light from stars long dead
in search of a place where our souls can shine...
-ed
Written by
DiscipleofLife
(Fenom)
Published 23rd Dec 2016
| Edited 14th Jan 2017
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 12
reading list entries 2
comments 24
reads 1405
Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
Re. -dead star light
23rd Dec 2016 7:33pm
So lovely in delivery, Fenom.
that I too have felt alone
surrounded by everyone
who had ever said they loved me
and how every hug made me feel
like I was a deserter
because no one could understand
the places I had to go to be myself...
That is to the core of an essence. Well done.
that I too have felt alone
surrounded by everyone
who had ever said they loved me
and how every hug made me feel
like I was a deserter
because no one could understand
the places I had to go to be myself...
That is to the core of an essence. Well done.
1
Re: Re. -dead star light
23rd Dec 2016 9:39pm
Re: Re. -dead star light
23rd Dec 2016 9:46pm
Re: Re. -dead star light
24th Dec 2016 12:06pm
Re. -dead star light
5th Jan 2017 4:31am
"because no one could understand the places I had to go to be myself..."
Bit late in getting here brother but the trip was worth it. Looking for more. 😞
Bit late in getting here brother but the trip was worth it. Looking for more. 😞
1
Re: Re. -dead star light
5th Jan 2017 10:52pm
Re. -dead star light
14th Jan 2017 6:05pm
Re: Re. -dead star light
15th Jan 2017 8:50pm
Re. -dead star light
14th Jan 2017 6:14pm
Ed such an unbelievably beautiful write so full of your soul and hers..
love Brenda
love Brenda
1
Re: Re. -dead star light
14th Jan 2017 6:15pm
Re. -dead star light
Anonymous
14th Jan 2017 6:19pm
le sigh
yes french sighs because fudge this is stellar
xo
yes french sighs because fudge this is stellar
xo
1
Re: Re. -dead star light
I feel like it's one of my best writes. Everything just fits together for me...
Thanks for reading, love...
Thanks for reading, love...
Re. -dead star light
Anonymous
14th Jan 2017 11:35pm
Very few poems touch me.
This one did.
~Devlin
1
Re: Re. -dead star light
15th Jan 2017 00:12am
Re. -dead star light
15th Jan 2017 8:11am
Very beautifully done. Vulnerable, yet hopeful.
Seems a little different than most of yours, more expressive...
Seems a little different than most of yours, more expressive...
1
Re: Re. -dead star light
15th Jan 2017 8:49pm
Re. -dead star light
23rd Feb 2017 1:22am
this is so utterly beautiful. just the words on their own are a marvel and your delivery just adds a crisp realness to it. this piece is amazing - it is so simple and so true and touches the feelings of so many people.
1
Re: Re. -dead star light
23rd Feb 2017 4:33pm
Re. -dead star light
6th Mar 2017 8:02pm
Congratulations! This poem has been nominated for Deep Underground Poetry's Featured Poem of the Month Competition. You may view the nomination at the link below, and will be notified if selected.
https://deepundergroundpoetry.com/forum/competitions/read/9494/
Best of Luck and thank you for being a member of the Deep Side!
https://deepundergroundpoetry.com/forum/competitions/read/9494/
Best of Luck and thank you for being a member of the Deep Side!
0
Re. -dead star light
26th Mar 2017 12:51pm
This is such a vulnerable poem... so open... so exposed...
I love spoken word and your voice adds so much depth to this piece...
Enjoyed... immensely!
I love spoken word and your voice adds so much depth to this piece...
Enjoyed... immensely!
1
Re: Re. -dead star light
26th Mar 2017 7:47pm
Thanks so much. yes, I'm told my voice does it for some of the ladies to say the least... :)
Re. -dead star light
Anonymous
11th Apr 2017 6:23am
Oh my good little fucking lords,
Yes, Disciple of the Phenoms, dear Fenon you are your name magnified
Yes, Disciple of the Phenoms, dear Fenon you are your name magnified
1
Re: Re. -dead star light
27th Mar 2018 9:00pm