deepundergroundpoetry.com
Erastis (lover)
I have lived a life sheltered, small beneath elder pines, shadowed by mountain crescendos, and guarded by the toxic quill of the Hawthorne tree. Each swelling of my heart is met by a cordon of a thousand living thorns.
Immured by an ideal of love, or what love was meant to be, I withered in the cruel reality of unlit days, too hidden to feel the sun's warmth. With only the night to soothe my longing, I hid quietly beneath its veils, stunted. A tragic heart is never granted safe passage and only death creates new life.
My body was weakend, unable to contain the beating of my own sorrow and I found darkness my only escape. I became night, set free to dance among the rhythms of owlsong while mother moon spun silk upon my naked skin. Stars glistened on my cheeks as I wore the velvet air like a fine perfume, blossoming into transcendence.
That is where I found you, waiting, adrift among atramentous skies, your eyes oppressive reflections of my own. Your name is Erastis, my breath of life, my fruition. Drenched in midnight, you brushed my lips with moonbeams, our nameless path remaining hung between the stars.
(Photo by Yuichi Takasaka / www.blue-moon.ca)
Immured by an ideal of love, or what love was meant to be, I withered in the cruel reality of unlit days, too hidden to feel the sun's warmth. With only the night to soothe my longing, I hid quietly beneath its veils, stunted. A tragic heart is never granted safe passage and only death creates new life.
My body was weakend, unable to contain the beating of my own sorrow and I found darkness my only escape. I became night, set free to dance among the rhythms of owlsong while mother moon spun silk upon my naked skin. Stars glistened on my cheeks as I wore the velvet air like a fine perfume, blossoming into transcendence.
That is where I found you, waiting, adrift among atramentous skies, your eyes oppressive reflections of my own. Your name is Erastis, my breath of life, my fruition. Drenched in midnight, you brushed my lips with moonbeams, our nameless path remaining hung between the stars.
(Photo by Yuichi Takasaka / www.blue-moon.ca)
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likes 13
reading list entries 3
comments 26
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Re. Erastis (lover)
2nd Dec 2016 11:06am
These metaphors provoke such imagery, and with aesthetic vocabulary. Magnificent piece.
1
Re: Re. Erastis (lover)
2nd Dec 2016 11:40am
Re. Erastis (lover)
becoming night. it's extraordinary poetry,
introspective & artful; a journey thru
the mountains & pines, Kas, dark as the ink...
introspective & artful; a journey thru
the mountains & pines, Kas, dark as the ink...
1
Re: Re. Erastis (lover)
2nd Dec 2016 11:33am
Thank you, John, and thank you again, always an amazingly thoughtful comment to leave a girl smiling.
The places poetry takes us, always a journey to be had...
The places poetry takes us, always a journey to be had...
Re. Erastis (lover)
Anonymous
2nd Dec 2016 12:14pm
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Re: Re. Erastis (lover)
3rd Dec 2016 00:14am
Re. Erastis (lover)
2nd Dec 2016 12:24pm
You never just tell us what you have in mind, you SHOW us with these incredibly visual journeys and landscapes. Your writing is practically tactile, Kasai. Became darkness, so much beauty in the dark. Thank you for sharing this, Kasai ☺
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Re: Re. Erastis (lover)
3rd Dec 2016 00:13am
What a very sweet thing to say,Willow, your lovely comments always leave me smiling. It is a very contradictory thing to see beauty in things not thought of as beautiful, so glad I could show them to you.
Thanks for stopping in to share...
Thanks for stopping in to share...
Re: Re. Erastis (lover)
8th Dec 2016 1:06am
I'm afraid I will prove quite stubborn if you try to show me the beauty in a spider though. Otherwise I'm wide open for the visuals. :)
1
Re: Re. Erastis (lover)
8th Dec 2016 2:27am
Ah, yes, I'm afraid I'll have to pass on the spiders, a big, no thank you on that one!..
Re. Erastis (lover)
2nd Dec 2016 2:01pm
breathtakingly gorgeous visuals in this..
the mood and atmosphere spectacular lovely Kasai..
love Crim
the mood and atmosphere spectacular lovely Kasai..
love Crim
1
Re: Re. Erastis (lover)
3rd Dec 2016 00:08am
Thanks so much, Crim, your amazing comments mean a lot.
It's always nice to see you visit...
It's always nice to see you visit...
Re. Erastis (lover)
3rd Dec 2016 1:13am
This is really excellent, it reminds me of a classic work almost like you stepped back in time to write it....
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Re: Re. Erastis (lover)
3rd Dec 2016 4:45am
Thank you, PR, what an interesting thought. Makes me wish I was more familiar with classic works. Perhaps I will broaden my horizons...
Re. Erastis (lover)
3rd Dec 2016 3:08pm
Crisp as a clear night, Kas. When we maintain our own unwavering path, destiny will cross it with like-minded.
1
Re: Re. Erastis (lover)
3rd Dec 2016 10:12pm
I really look forward to your insight, Ahavati, it sounds so simply put, yet we don't always see its clarity. Very wise of you.
Thank you for sharing, I guess sometimes it takes someone to point it out to us...
Thank you for sharing, I guess sometimes it takes someone to point it out to us...
Re. Erastis (lover)
4th Dec 2016 12:26pm
Re: Re. Erastis (lover)
4th Dec 2016 7:36pm
Re. Erastis (lover)
Your prose poetry has the intensity and ancient-seeming spirituality of religious scripture. Although I liked your work in this vein, I struggled for a while to really appreciate it, because I kept trying to fit it into a conventional, modern sense of narrative, with clear characterisations and progression of events. What I see in it now, however, is the first-person psalms known to old religion, where the narrator speaks to both herself and to the particular God-image that she has.
A couple of grammar things: "sooth" should be "soothe" in that context, and "fuition" "fruition". By the way, you taught me a new word in "atramentous", and I'm always powerfully grateful for that, so thank you! And, as always, thank you for the read. xxx
A couple of grammar things: "sooth" should be "soothe" in that context, and "fuition" "fruition". By the way, you taught me a new word in "atramentous", and I'm always powerfully grateful for that, so thank you! And, as always, thank you for the read. xxx
1
Re. Erastis (lover)
I always like to see your responses on my pages, it's nice to have an honest opinion and the critiques are a learning experience for me. Very flattered by the RL, and to hear that I have taught you was quite a suprise.
Your thoughts on the style of this one lead me to realize that it did, in fact come from a more spiritual place than others I've written.
Thanks for the kind words and advice, always appreciated...
Your thoughts on the style of this one lead me to realize that it did, in fact come from a more spiritual place than others I've written.
Thanks for the kind words and advice, always appreciated...
Re. Erastis (lover)
Anonymous
6th Dec 2016 4:25am
Kasai, these lines swept me away...far, far away.....wrapping me in a blanket....stunning....
"I became night, set free to dance among the rhythms of owlsong while mother moon spun silk upon my naked skin. Stars glistened on my cheeks as I wore the velvet air like a fine perfume, blossoming into transcendence."
xoxo Taryn
"I became night, set free to dance among the rhythms of owlsong while mother moon spun silk upon my naked skin. Stars glistened on my cheeks as I wore the velvet air like a fine perfume, blossoming into transcendence."
xoxo Taryn
1
Re: Re. Erastis (lover)
6th Dec 2016 7:01pm
Re. Erastis (lover)
7th Dec 2016 4:05am
"My body was weakend, unable to contain the beating of my own sorrow and I found darkness my only escape"
Each and every write of yours moves me deeply, it's almost like I'm reading parts of me... the imagery in this one is so beautiful, I'm speechless...
Each and every write of yours moves me deeply, it's almost like I'm reading parts of me... the imagery in this one is so beautiful, I'm speechless...
1
Re: Re. Erastis (lover)
7th Dec 2016 5:42am
That's so sweet, Duende, such an amazing comment.
And I am flattered to know this moved you, thank you so much for feeling my words...
And I am flattered to know this moved you, thank you so much for feeling my words...
Re. Erastis (lover)
Anonymous
10th Dec 2016 10:14am
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Re: Re. Erastis (lover)
10th Dec 2016 1:39pm