deepundergroundpoetry.com
I Give You
Shit
I can't publish
shit
I can't post
shit
that hits you
where it hurts
me the most
Fuck
your fawning
fuck
your praise
fuck you
in so many ways
I can't
translate your
shit these days
Damn
you and your
wicked words
damn
the fucking learning
curve
damn it
cram it
shove it
all in
and
take it
take it
take
it
BACK
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likes 7
reading list entries 0
comments 13
reads 741
Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
Anonymous
- Edited 9th Nov 2018 2:45pm
19th Sep 2016 5:26pm
<< post removed >>
Re: Re. I Give You
19th Sep 2016 6:06pm
Thank you doll. Raw and to the point is a good description of me and at least some of my poetry :)
Re. I Give You
19th Sep 2016 7:39pm
Re. I Give You
20th Sep 2016 5:13pm
Decent, I like how it brings the anger of low self confidence, mixed with the annoyance of people trying to make you feel better
0
Re: Re. I Give You
20th Sep 2016 6:24pm
Re. I Give You
20th Sep 2016 9:58pm
This expresses frustration in a poetic way
in both form and language. It's poetry that
kicks the gate in before the door.
in both form and language. It's poetry that
kicks the gate in before the door.
1
Re. I Give You
24th Sep 2016 6:04am
Shit, fuck and damn, I dig the anger, M'am. The rhythm especially percolates in the second stanza. I think you can even work more phrases in the piece to create a real tour de force with an ebb and flow cadence going that explodes at the end. Nice job !
0
Re: Re. I Give You
27th Sep 2016 1:38pm
Re. I Give You
21st Jun 2017 2:10am
Very good! I love the way this poem is organised, Trix. I like the rap like rhyming too. The message is clear & very hard hitting. You leave this individual in no doubt that you mean business as you spell it out.
Great write. ;-)
Great write. ;-)
0
Anonymous
- Edited 8th Nov 2018 00:49am
16th Sep 2018 9:49am
<< post removed >>