What do I want from you?

Straight question. Usually simple and clear for me. But hard to deliver when her roommate is still sitting there, missing cues.
I keep having the kinds of talks with him his father should've gave, but change is slow.

So fuck it, this question got avoided for 48 hours til it returned to me in a freestyle. Texted just now...


“What do you want from me? Can you write it in a letter?”
You were joking but fuck it. Let's say I don't know better?
No pandering due, I just maintain a standard of truth
Always expected more from myself than I ever did from any of you

You being the world, me being glued to the words I bomb
Word is bond where real life carries it on to the end of the day
Otherwise all those pearls we array are just verbal ballet
And while hurdles may challenge my fray, I won't waste useless moves even for a second or two.

“I accept you.”
“You're weird.”
“Okay.”
“That's not a bad thing.”

Cause egads it’d bring a sting to be far from norm?
Conformity strangles liberty.
Tu quoque. Just like me, you’re odd every way compadre
And I'm sure you see more than I ever say…

I almost can't cancel plans when we share proximity
Because of the instant rise of energy
Returning to me, from intertwined lines of ships that pass in the night
Unwinding free sails that never stop or tire

You remind me of every female hip hop artist I ever admired
Chart my observations and track each wire
Half the time they take form from skyview
Like Nazca Lines, shining through

Meta-dynamic shares all I have to give
Set the standard, then beware and see shit bare. That's how I fully live.
Human story surgeon staring through the narrative
Like “Nevermore!”, purging guilt due that Poe rue’d

(Threw me for a loop that you were aware of this)
I shouldn't have been surprised. Dr. Everything never seems to miss!
That’s cool cause I ensnare every gist,
Like the most dedicated to the forest for the trees, predatory will o’ wisp.

“Hey, Dr. Everything. When are you finally gonna use your dangerous mind to bring down an asteroid so we can make some tritium and solve this global problem, yo?”

Totalled up the options, call it a go. Got quick with this, sculpting
Let's go start socially conscious business consulting
Hold down economic checks and witness first what’s going on from holdings
Patterns chart, scattered sparks, inspect the parts, connect the dots…

Reflect larger starts where the 1% set up shop, invest back in spots
To read through the shit nobody tells me
Like the regis Machiavelli’s private journals in braille
I could always follow any funny tale through the money trail

And you’ve got the attitude to prove every sale
Never settle or wail. Stick to the mission, vision for figures.
Disapprove of the rigged mixer. Move to the big picture
Peddle what that entails, urgently clued

Like hurrying to use radios screwed after air drops of metal flechette hail in World War II
Fuck it, some rhymes are just convenient, even though my mind really means it
I just want to not waste time, nerdy brain sees a dirty game
And some part of me heard “Clean this!”

But I can't radiation-flick all the sheeple, even if that would fix the people
So all's I really want is that zazen state of flowing with an equal!