opportunity lost

It's after three am, Gina lays next to me, semi awake. The last few weeks have been rough, were both stressed out and at our breaking point. With me working closing shift we've always been.short on alone time, but since kyle for out there ain't been alone time. Between work, kids and him I can't get a moment alone to relax and unwind.

He's more strung out them he was before he went to prison, and the only time he leaves my place is when I'm out of dope. He was supposed to go to rehab a couple days ago but he fucked it off and blew his shot. I talked his drug abuse counselor into getting him into rehab and sober living on the other side of the state and it wasn't easy. She moved heaven and hell to get him in there on such short notice and she's pissed he blew it.

She told me his p.o. put out a warrant the same morning and considering the fact that he's gotten more chances them most would id be amazed of he doesn't get his parole revoked and have to sit out his seven year stretch.

He came over today cuz this is the address on his registry and of he's not compliant 93rd a level 6 felony. After thinking it over I realized that if they come here looking for him its all but certain theyd hit me with harboring a fugitive along with Gina and theyd take the kids for sure.

I told him I can't do it hes gotta stay somewhere else, he got it and understood, i think I may have convinced him to turn himself in as well. He's supposed to give himself up tomorrow afternoon once he gets some realeses signed so I can talk to his lawyer and handle things he can't do from prison.

He told me that a text I sent him after he blew his chance at rehab  hit him hard and made him tear up because he saw how disappointed I was. He said that of id been anyone else itd just have made him mad, but I was the only one who wrote him regularly and made sure he had somethin on his books and took care of his baby mama while he was inside.

He knows I'm only tryin to watch out for him and that i do actually want what's best for him. I told him I don't want him to be 26 and still battling his addiction like me because I want him to do better and not have to go thru everything i have before he wakes up.

I hope He is serious and sticks to his plan, its a matter of time maybe a say maybe a decade but he's gonna have to do his time someday, he's better off getting it over with.