deepundergroundpoetry.com
the trumpets they go
jazz poetry
the violin weeps
the piano trips languid
over black&white keys
the drums are hard
they shake us like savages
but the trumpet’s blast
comes with thunder & lightning
the mountain smoking
& I could make you
I could make you love me
it’s in the sultry music
that rips out dirty lyrics
it’s in the breathing
your breathing gets heavier, woman
you anticipate a private seduction
that leads you by the hand
to the center of your bad girl desires
& I could make you
I could make you love me
I wander, like a trumpeteer
playing one night stands
so many cities, under so many moons
from one bar to the next
one lonely lover to the next
but when I’m with you
it’s just you & me, baby
& I could make you
I could make you love me
but I won’t…
Published 11th Aug 2015
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 19
reading list entries 2
comments 17
reads 1678
Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
Anonymous
11th Aug 2015 4:20am
What if she wants you to?
Well done, feddeler! Well done.
Well done, feddeler! Well done.
Anonymous
- Edited 25th Sep 2020 3:45am
11th Aug 2015 4:20am
<< post removed >>
11th Aug 2015 4:35am
Perfect. Distance preserves the muse. And, after all, isn't the simplicity of knowing enough?
11th Aug 2015 8:27am
Anonymous
11th Aug 2015 1:04pm
The pleasure is more in the mind than elsewhere. You can insert it with such ease John.
11th Aug 2015 2:13pm
" sing me a sad song" it's the absolute unattainable, that make ones so alluring!!!
Lyrical blue John- Beautiful!!!
Lyrical blue John- Beautiful!!!
11th Aug 2015 2:45pm
To the center of those bad girl desires.
Oh yes! Just a great fucking line.
But i wont.
Hmmm, you amaze me. 💋
Oh yes! Just a great fucking line.
But i wont.
Hmmm, you amaze me. 💋
11th Aug 2015 2:53pm
John love your style and the ending is a killer..
"& I could make you
I could make you love me
but I won’t…"
too late Sir swooning for you
with love Crim
"& I could make you
I could make you love me
but I won’t…"
too late Sir swooning for you
with love Crim
11th Aug 2015 3:25pm
11th Aug 2015 5:18pm
I really love the description of the music in the beginning. It's almost as if I can really hear it! Excellent description!
11th Aug 2015 7:37pm
The trumpet's blast in the second stanza makes me wonder if the trumpet might belong to Gidgeon. Could be a different story entirely. Fine work in any case.
Anonymous
12th Aug 2015 5:32am
this was a wonderfully enjoyable read, thank you
it would be lovely put to music it flows so well. I can feel the sultry, steamy soul of the piece.
it would be lovely put to music it flows so well. I can feel the sultry, steamy soul of the piece.
Anonymous
12th Aug 2015 7:27am
you could....yes you could...:)
12th Aug 2015 12:47pm
oh goodness, it appears to be an afternoon for amazing poetry, does it not...
"& I could make you
I could make you love me
it’s in the sultry music
that rips out dirty lyrics
it’s in the breathing"
... you could melt the hardest of hearts, mister feddeler
"& I could make you
I could make you love me
it’s in the sultry music
that rips out dirty lyrics
it’s in the breathing"
... you could melt the hardest of hearts, mister feddeler
13th Aug 2015 5:20pm
13th Aug 2015 11:20pm
i dare say John the line '& I could make you, I could make you love me, but I won’t… ' is redunant for the readers of your poetry....it's already happened.... :)
20th Aug 2015 12:46pm
the drums are hard
they shake us like savages
So true and full of life, your description is right on the money. I can't get over your immense talent JF, each poem I read is a new revelation. As a musician that never toured I know many who have and that is the true way of that world. I could make you love me but I won't. And, so many cities under so many moons. A lonely life made bearable by those brief times onstage and with a new lover. I love it. Great poem. One for my reading list for sure.
they shake us like savages
So true and full of life, your description is right on the money. I can't get over your immense talent JF, each poem I read is a new revelation. As a musician that never toured I know many who have and that is the true way of that world. I could make you love me but I won't. And, so many cities under so many moons. A lonely life made bearable by those brief times onstage and with a new lover. I love it. Great poem. One for my reading list for sure.
