deepundergroundpoetry.com
No good bye
Oh sweets, I loved your auburn hair
your freckles and your reckless smile.
Your infectious laughter from deep inside
is your hallmark and hasn’t yet fully died.
Your face looks tired now
your smile has paled
your frame's as fragile as a little bird's.
But when we hug you seem just the same
solid as a rock and strong and sane.
I promise not to let you down, we’ll stride
together through valleys of tears and
the blackest of nights
until the sun rises again,
lightening up your being, erasing your pain.
Won’t let you go, will be at your side
won’t ever accept a simple good bye.
No good bye - Senryu
Your spiritedness
Shadow of your former self
You’ll weather the storm
To my friend Sabine
your freckles and your reckless smile.
Your infectious laughter from deep inside
is your hallmark and hasn’t yet fully died.
Your face looks tired now
your smile has paled
your frame's as fragile as a little bird's.
But when we hug you seem just the same
solid as a rock and strong and sane.
I promise not to let you down, we’ll stride
together through valleys of tears and
the blackest of nights
until the sun rises again,
lightening up your being, erasing your pain.
Won’t let you go, will be at your side
won’t ever accept a simple good bye.
No good bye - Senryu
Your spiritedness
Shadow of your former self
You’ll weather the storm
To my friend Sabine
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 11
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comments 28
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The author encourages honest critique.
Re: No good bye
23rd Sep 2014 12:54pm
both the longer and
the shorter piece are
beautiful testaments to
love and friendship...
the shorter piece are
beautiful testaments to
love and friendship...
1
re: Re: No good bye
23rd Sep 2014 1:10pm
Re: No good bye
23rd Sep 2014 1:22pm
This was a very touching piece my dear...
I feel very happy to see you
extend your thoughts here, n add your trademark
style at the end :)
I feel very happy to see you
extend your thoughts here, n add your trademark
style at the end :)
1
re: Re: No good bye
Dear Poe, moved by your kind words I am (yoda-style, huh?).
I'm not here much and if it's mostly for a flying visit. Haven't much time left for commenting on poetry (neither for my own ideas) but will do so nonetheless!
My trademark style :-). That's a nice way to describe my affinity to haikus :-)!
Hugs ...
I'm not here much and if it's mostly for a flying visit. Haven't much time left for commenting on poetry (neither for my own ideas) but will do so nonetheless!
My trademark style :-). That's a nice way to describe my affinity to haikus :-)!
Hugs ...
Re: No good bye
23rd Sep 2014 1:29pm
re: Re: No good bye
Glad you feel it since
the main thing for me's indeed
my poems being FELT. (well, that sounds odd. Somehow)
Thanks for your warm words, Speak.
x
the main thing for me's indeed
my poems being FELT. (well, that sounds odd. Somehow)
Thanks for your warm words, Speak.
x
Re: No good bye
23rd Sep 2014 4:13pm
Chiyo, luv :-* ~
I think the world of this poem.
To me, it speaks of love, deep and abiding. The finest of what friendship can hold. A sheer perseverance is the tale told here too. And hope, that as well, luv.
May the force be with you both... :-*
I think the world of this poem.
To me, it speaks of love, deep and abiding. The finest of what friendship can hold. A sheer perseverance is the tale told here too. And hope, that as well, luv.
May the force be with you both... :-*
1
re: Re: No good bye
Dear Savaja, your lovely words mean a world to me since this pom is dedicated to my best friend who's suffering at the moment and will do for some time. Your words mean so much to me, show they empathy and a compassionate heart. The force will be with us!!! Thanks to you! xo
Re: No good bye
I am touched by your devotion in this very sobering piece. You are truly a compassionate and loyal friend.
1
re: Re: No good bye
23rd Sep 2014 9:28pm
True friendship is more precious than anything else in the world. Except for true love perhaps. But no, true love's just different but as much valuable. I'm glad you feel this poem.
re: re: Re: No good bye
23rd Sep 2014 10:56pm
re: re: re: Re: No good bye
24th Sep 2014 7:15am
Hm, yes. You're right. It might be necessary to be able to feel and live true friendship in order to be able to feel and have true love.
Re: No good bye
23rd Sep 2014 10:14pm
So Beautiful Iris..She is so fortunate to have your love and support..true friendship runs deeper than any ocean! xx
1
re: Re: No good bye
24th Sep 2014 7:18am
Dear Je(xo), I'm too,
fortunate to have her as a friend. Always loyal and always with the best intentions though brutally honest sometimes :-). She's always been my best friend from adolescene on. Thank you for your heartfelt comment, dear Je!xx
fortunate to have her as a friend. Always loyal and always with the best intentions though brutally honest sometimes :-). She's always been my best friend from adolescene on. Thank you for your heartfelt comment, dear Je!xx
Re: No good bye
23rd Sep 2014 11:59pm
re: Re: No good bye
24th Sep 2014 7:22am
Ah, I'm a woman for long-term friendships and relationships :-). Ask my husband ... But I think it only natural to hold together in bad days, too. That's what friends (and partners) are for. To give unlimited support during bad days.
Re: No good bye
24th Sep 2014 1:27am
So warm,trusting and giving...what a wonderful lap for her to lay her head on (love)
1
re: Re: No good bye
24th Sep 2014 7:25am
Well, we don't really do the lap thing but in me she has a friend's heart, mind and shoulder. Always. Thank you, Hash :-).
re: re: Re: No good bye
25th Sep 2014 1:40am
Just what I meant Miss Chi,someone to comfort her (strength and energy to her)
1
re: re: re: Re: No good bye
25th Sep 2014 6:45pm
Ah, okay :-). You native speakers of the beautiful English language are so eloquent and sometimes I simply don't get you right. Thanks Hash, for broadening my mind and vocab :-)!!! xo
Re: No good bye
24th Sep 2014 4:28am
re: Re: No good bye
24th Sep 2014 7:33am
Your sweet comment brings a smile to my face and fills my heart with warmth, John. Thank you.
Re: No good bye
Beautiful sentiments and testament to the character and spirit within you. :) Its wonderful to read.
1
Re: No good bye
24th Sep 2014 7:35am
Thank you so much, Pishashee, she really brings the best out of me. And sometimes the worst, too, but then we have real fun :-).
Re: No good bye
24th Sep 2014 10:02am
You've captured one of the great fortunes of friendship beautifully here dear Chiyo ... this was soothing
1
re: Re: No good bye
24th Sep 2014 12:23pm
It took me long to decide whether to publish this poem or not because it's very personal. I decided to do so because I wanted to share it with people with whom I'm connected through poetry and of whom I was hoping they'd understand. Your lovely reaction shows that I did the right thing. Thanks so much, dear LSP.
Re: No good bye
4th Oct 2014 7:50pm
I felt swept away by emotion and held my breath while reading the words. You touched me so.
cheers.
cheers.
1
re: Re: No good bye
It is always an honor to touch someone with one's words. You made me absolutely happy with your kind comment, forever_young! Thank you so much!