deepundergroundpoetry.com
Mirror
This ain't a Justin Timberlake love melody
Its an ode to every thing wrong with me
You casually speak my flaws aloud
As if enough haven't been found
My reflection and conscience rape me violently
Making a defiled fool of me...
One cut, Two cut,Three cut,Four
Bleed my troubles to the floor
Sliced up like a cat o nine tails scourge
But its just my broken mirror, with its jagged edge
Its an ode to every thing wrong with me
You casually speak my flaws aloud
As if enough haven't been found
My reflection and conscience rape me violently
Making a defiled fool of me...
One cut, Two cut,Three cut,Four
Bleed my troubles to the floor
Sliced up like a cat o nine tails scourge
But its just my broken mirror, with its jagged edge
Published 22nd Aug 2014
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The author encourages honest critique.
22nd Aug 2014 3:30am
Nice write. I could feel the emotions and I could relate.
I liked the rhyme scheme. Well, it may not be a rhyme scheme. I just feel like the words have this rhythm to them that makes them sound like they could rhyme. I don't know, but it's good.
The italics are a little off putting for me. That's mainly just personal preference.
I liked the rhyme scheme. Well, it may not be a rhyme scheme. I just feel like the words have this rhythm to them that makes them sound like they could rhyme. I don't know, but it's good.
The italics are a little off putting for me. That's mainly just personal preference.
