Who am I?

A broken heart in love. So heavy when it beats, it weighs down my guard. The beating of a solitude drum of an artery pumped with the pain from which it recovers. Pumping silent. Beating heavy. The blood is amber from rushing too long unchecked. This eye has been seen by obscene scenes of gratuitous violence and sexual deviances not to be beamed to the naked eye. Compelled to numb my emotions. To dissociate myself from me. Becoming an insensitive puppet of the demon gods with instructions to promote heartlessness and rebellion. All the time questioning my maker. WHO AM I! I have names and nicknames by all who acquaint with me but I myself am john doe to my own being. Who am i? with each experience I am meant to grow. But with so many bad decisions I fall further and further back in evolution. Until the animal inside breaks out and stands its ground against reasoning and logic. The perspective of true human nature is blurred by hate and deception. The apple tree blossoms with forbidden fruit rapidly. Happily we pick and regret the outcome oh so sadly. It looks sweet and tender but it tastes so bitter. The taste lingers for days on end forgetting that prayer is the toothpaste I endure the ugliness of bad fruit. Memories of childhood are an essential therapeutic prescription to a lost soul. The dna of innocence is written within the cells that once were too young to self-destruct. Too pure to dwell on negative emotions. Too precious to hate. Happiness is being young again. Starting over. Love uninterrupted by bad influences. A fluid mind not clogged by selfishness and greed. This is who I want to be. A happy little child who grew up and still smiles. I screwed up for a long time but through much I still have time to do what I see is right. A broken heart is now in love and with love I transcend time.