Poem of the Month - February 2018

I've always known life as a poker game
Calculating potential by the hand we've been dealt
We're faced with choices, one
After another, with no scale to measure morality
Nor the consequences we're dragged through

Our parents raise us
Injecting us with their own views, perspectives
And values
They force perfection on us,
Dragging us to to whiten our teeth, to force a masterpiece
That wasn't meant to be
I recall the decision when I was seven years old
Evil beckoned from the dark
Corners of my mind
The thoughts that are my deepest secret
And most shameful fear
Almost doing acts that were the symptoms of serial killers
Yet I turned my head, crawled my way
Out of the dark that laughed at my feeble attempts
To breathe light

A walking contradiction,
Dyed hair and piercings,
Combat boots and cigarettes,
But raised in perfection of education
And charisma, social etiquette
As I grew older, my ideals began to different greatly
From those who raised me
I saw the darkness in their hearts, mirroring the heart I could
Have chosen that cold day in September

So I fought, blindly,
Scratching at the hands that fed me
And instead hunting for my own
I hit back to his punches
I stopped listening when she shouted
I became free

The independence, however,
Was not priceless
Guilt plagues my lungs and loneliness
Dances on my ribcage
A young hurricane, created from silver and gold
But stuck in the rainbow of the oil slick
Gifted, they say
Broken, I argue
Naive, he shouts
Wiser, I spit
Dumb, she laughs
Brave, I whisper
Criminal, it murmurs

Rebel, I call

From the sullen ground has risen many foul mists, but none have caught the New Year moon.
Its complexion, overfull of cocoa butter
till the case drips in solitary seams.

As nothing has reached that moon, but the howl of the wolves in the mountain,
let’s set our dreams also upon it.
That which we resolve to do,
that which we resolve to feel,
let us aim those arrows into its craters.

And just how the heavens imitate our cry,
that we have perpetuated in the solace of a bed of tears,
by the neon markings that seep through the night,
I know that each tear was counted and amassed in its own constellation.

This next year, our regrets are already encased in a map of astronomy.
New regrets await us in the further birth of stellar orbits
listened to as cable static sourced from the sound of the growing universe.

But happiness still. I'm sure happiness still
awaits us.
At our windowsills, a light crawls like a lady bug up the misty pane.
And it's a new year, a new rising of the sun.

In the morning
as you are wrapped
Around me
Holding on like I was the prize
As if I were the special one
I can't stop myself
From looking forward
And I see the day
When you will leave
When I am destroyed
And must be rebuilt again
So I stay here
Now
And try to push that day away

           
the sun dappled sidewalk listened            
as I stomped out            
my discontent on it's obliging face            
           
then with a sneer            
& a wink            
it spoke to me            
           
told me of all            
the stories it's heard            
as people release their secrets            
to the winding streets            
           
the man with the limp            
has a fat wife at home            
his back broken from her weight            
       
the man's sorrow is heard            
then duly noted by the sidewalk          
who leads him to a mistress          
on the other side of town            
           
a whore            
& her clacking stilettos            
scream out her anger          
at an under paying john            
           
her rage taken out            
on the forgiving pavement            
who knows this soul well            
           
children skip to my loo            
& ring around the rosy             
tickles the sidewalk            
           
their mirth contagious            
ripples out            
from the soles of their shoes            
           
the utter horror            
it feels as a step is forever silenced            
murder most foul            
an all too common occurrence here            
           
then in a somber tone            
it tells me it keeps record            
of humanities wanderings            
           
for it is the road where all dreams lead            
& our path homeward            
           
     
   
   
Copyright © 2018 Crimsin. All Rights Reserved    
   
   
   
         
 

                     
within the torment                                  
of a poet's soul                                  
is an aged whiskey                                  
mellow & old                                  
                                  
it burns going down                                  
then becomes a glowing warmth                                  
                   
get intoxicated on our verse                              
the spirit of the poet                                    
is laced inside these powerful words                                  
                                  
witness our warrior soul                        
loosed on the page                                  
all the beauty & the ache                                  
                                  
our anger a killer                                    
if you're a beginner please refrain                                  
                                  
sip the juices of an erotic                                    
giggles, I dare you                                    
after walk a straight line                                  
                                  
the lust & love in us so beguiling                                    
our poetry casts a spell,                                 
charmed we succumb                      
                                  
then there are the rare gems                           
beautiful soul journeyers                                    
the fates witnessed us separate                                  
& saw fit to bring as one                                  
                          
this is your empath family                                  
the gods own chosen                                    
                     
you are gifted to walk                      
this journey with them                                  
now, until the very end                      
                     
                     
*edited & reposted