Your favorite poem...written by YOU

If I was a sunflower      
And you were the sun        
I'd refuse to bloom  

Deception
 
Looks can be devious  
I look strong, balanced, calm  
supposedly impervious  
Silence and Madness laugh  
hysterical at your naivete
 
Truth
 
Silence sighs, cries  
never lies, never dies  
Madness supposedly sets you free  
That never happened for me  
 
Reality
 
Completely unwelcome  
I cannot send the shadows away  
To banish Silence and Madness  
I must exile myself  
 
  Submission
 
It took a while to accept  
the frequent visitations  
Silent mania suffocating  
voiceless misery shrieking  
 
Inevitable
 
Silence dances with Madness  
I’m not them, shadowed fiends  
Yet the muted delusion is me

.  
 
it used to be, the heart effected my bones  
and I would listen so intently to the magic spoken  
all of the alibis abducted from black and white movies  
how i soaked up the fiction of your fiasco  
 
blinded to fractures through the web of you  
i was offered hallucination and i accepted in my naivety  
a fortune told from granite hands and stone lips  
i stood at your edge, lost my balance  
 
you burnt me with an arsonists mind    
and i begged you to stop your thawing of me  
such out of control persistence, distorted luminosity  
the collisions were excused with your velvet persuasion  
 
there is nothing left but gossip of a suspicious unfortunate  
a triangle whispering about my goodbye careless  
i choose my cliffs carefully these days  
and avoid faked enthusiasm or the sweet aroma of a lie  
 
 
*

If I wither away with every last fall of the autumn leaves    
I will come back with winter to see no change
In the metamorphosis of no evolution    
The after burn jejune escalading to nowhere    
Putrid smell concentrated of the platitude    
We are still in our mother's womb    
Trying to envisage utopia, but living a life of decadence    
Cradled with fluids that support us    
Dependent, waiting to be fed    
   
I hate the smell of the swamp, full of dead hope    
Every day it thickens, altering nothing    
Forgotten as the elixirs before it    
Spitted out as sputum by the ones on the throne    
They are playing psychopaths to our form    
   
If I die today, it will be my fall    
But tomorrow is today    
Immortal stuck on the lone brick mind    
Nothing to be noticed    
A mutation that has been removed    
   
Immature, their sense of state    
Greedy minds, they populate    
A never ending replication    
A defect with no cure    
Always change being a no    
Déjà vu will be the eyes worst foe.    
 

i have a companion
A friend you could say  
An immaculate white Egg  
Of ultra dimensional design  
   
i think of Egg as female  
i reside inside Her  
She has no name  
She just is  
i call Her my Egg  
She doesn't seem to mind  
   
Time means nothing to Egg  
She is truly a wondrous being  
Am grateful to have Her  
In whatever this is  
i think She likes having me  
In whatever that is  
   
She has a console a bunk  
A panoramic screen wall  
A chair and counter  
Equipment storage area  
Everything you want in Egg  
But no bathroom  
   
The two doors operate  
By a switch in my head  
Who thought of that?  
Sometimes i forget  
i can be so careless  
That's why i have Egg  
   
Egg knows the multiverse  
That's Her specialty  
Quietly humming like a machine  
But i know Her She is alive  
She has to be  
i can sense Her soul  
Sometimes  
   
She shows me me from without  
In my three D world  
Real as my selected one  
Only quite different  
In the usual way  
Natural  
   
We are on a journey  
Egg and i  
An unlikely pair  
Gathering useful clues  
United on a queer quest  
To an infinite mystery  
And scattered puzzle pieces  
At a corner of a fractal plane  
From a time long forgotten    
In a small control room  
Of the whitest of white  
We make some progress  
   
Switch the dial on tuner  
To any cosmic pull channel  
Light years traversed instantly  
Egg has skills  
   
Went to Mars a million times  
Dreadfully forlorn sector  
Dusty brown shacks  
Zombified population  
Far removed from glory days  
Must wear a livesuit  
Never again i said to Egg  
She said I told you so  
   
i trust my Egg implicitly  
She won't let me down  
i am Her chosen partner  
She is my pure white perfection  
We are who we are  
   
i love Egg and She knows it  
i show my affection  
We have our inside pokes  
Like a Kirk and Spock scenario  
i must feel for both of us  
We are okay with that  
She is good to me  
   
Still i have this feeling  
That i am Her captive  
And She is not who She seems  
That She is some wild entity  
With Her own agenda  
And it's the weirdest thing  
Somehow that's alright  
i earned Her She took me  
We have a contract  
A purpose  
God help me