Surreal Seeking Honest Critique Poems
#surreal
gothicsurrealism
Daniel Long
Daniel Long
Poem Published
21st Nov 2024 11:11pm
21st Nov 2024 11:11pm
Eyes Ablaze
This fury within…
Eyes ablaze with the hellfire from within.
Once a soul within, it has long burned
into a pile of ash which smolders on,
but it will never come back to me.
I understand my body thus is no more
than a rotten edifice waiting to finally collapse.
Eyes ablaze with the hellfire from within.
Once a soul within, it has long burned
into a pile of ash which smolders on,
but it will never come back to me.
I understand my body thus is no more
than a rotten edifice waiting to finally collapse.
#anger
#dark
#MentalHealth
#nightmares
#surreal
74 reads
0 Comments
gothicsurrealism
Daniel Long
Daniel Long
Poem Published
20th Nov 2024 12:36pm
20th Nov 2024 12:36pm
Hollow Man
Hollow of eyes,
these shut eyelids
cast out the light.
The eyes of this soulless man
fused shut years ago to the light.
Light that would melt the ice within.
Hollow of a voice,
these shut lips
hide my cold thoughts.
The voice of this empty man
choked mute long ago.
Mute to expressions of empathy.
Hollow of warmth,
this icy skin
encasing a body void of a soul.
these shut eyelids
cast out the light.
The eyes of this soulless man
fused shut years ago to the light.
Light that would melt the ice within.
Hollow of a voice,
these shut lips
hide my cold thoughts.
The voice of this empty man
choked mute long ago.
Mute to expressions of empathy.
Hollow of warmth,
this icy skin
encasing a body void of a soul.
#dark
#MentalHealth
#scary #surreal
#scary #surreal
107 reads
0 Comments
gothicsurrealism
Daniel Long
Daniel Long
Poem Published
18th Nov 2024 4:42pm
18th Nov 2024 4:42pm
Love With Shut Eyes
Love lost in the light.
Lost with eyes wide open!
Even with the sun burning
the darkness of my shadow.
Love found in the dark.
Found with eyes shut!
Even with the sun’s descent
I gaze on with shut eyes.
Love lost and found
between light and dark.
The sight of beauty
with shut eyes so profound.
Lost with eyes wide open!
Even with the sun burning
the darkness of my shadow.
Love found in the dark.
Found with eyes shut!
Even with the sun’s descent
I gaze on with shut eyes.
Love lost and found
between light and dark.
The sight of beauty
with shut eyes so profound.
#crush
#FallingInLove
#love
#MentalHealth
#surreal
171 reads
1 Comment
gothicsurrealism
Daniel Long
Daniel Long
Poem Published
17th Nov 2024 4:55pm
17th Nov 2024 4:55pm
Gentle Thunderstorms Within
There is a soothing storm within.
Gently, thunder booms from my heart.
Gentle heartbeats make emotional waves
and I cannot stop my feelings for her.
There is a teary deluge within.
My tears, the wine of my loneliness,
which intoxicates me until I’m love-struck
and then I am inebriated with the red wine of love.
The cloudburst in the sky of my crimson eyes,
the drunkenness of being wanted,
the overwhelming desire to be loved,
as for the arctic reality, my heart thunders on.
Gently, thunder booms from my heart.
Gentle heartbeats make emotional waves
and I cannot stop my feelings for her.
There is a teary deluge within.
My tears, the wine of my loneliness,
which intoxicates me until I’m love-struck
and then I am inebriated with the red wine of love.
The cloudburst in the sky of my crimson eyes,
the drunkenness of being wanted,
the overwhelming desire to be loved,
as for the arctic reality, my heart thunders on.
#crush
#depression
#FallingInLove
#MentalHealth
#surreal
153 reads
4 Comments
PAR
Poem Published
1st Oct 2024 1:21pm
1st Oct 2024 1:21pm
Empire of Senses
My love aches for purple abandonment
In the twilight of forgotten crops.
Where shadows dance with silent lament
and the moon spews forth black dew drops.
Oh, how the ocean gets addicted
to the rapture of poodles in flight!
The stars whisper secrets
in the madness of velvet delight.
Eternity fiddles with time’s strings
a symphony of chaos and grace.
Heaven shines like jelly, voluptuous,
in the embrace of a Dodo’s face.
The sun throbs with fermented oysters.
Its rays a tapestry of decay
as a red...
In the twilight of forgotten crops.
Where shadows dance with silent lament
and the moon spews forth black dew drops.
Oh, how the ocean gets addicted
to the rapture of poodles in flight!
The stars whisper secrets
in the madness of velvet delight.
Eternity fiddles with time’s strings
a symphony of chaos and grace.
Heaven shines like jelly, voluptuous,
in the embrace of a Dodo’s face.
The sun throbs with fermented oysters.
Its rays a tapestry of decay
as a red...
#art
#despair
#emptiness
#romantic
#surreal
146 reads
3 Comments
Pinkdreams
Poem Published
27th Jul 2024 7:19am
27th Jul 2024 7:19am
Now He's into Mice and AI
In high school
he was into me
Groped me in my sparkly blue Firebird
as we listened to Billy Joel
I pushed him away
I can't help it, he said
You've got looks.
He was just part of my crowd
Never a close friend
Definitely not a boyfriend
Hadn't thought of him in ages
Looked him up on Facebook
His background photo shows mice
So does his portrait photo.
Mice!
Mice everywhere.
Hand built castles for mice
with tiny arched doorways,
and meticulously designed
little napping...
he was into me
Groped me in my sparkly blue Firebird
as we listened to Billy Joel
I pushed him away
I can't help it, he said
You've got looks.
He was just part of my crowd
Never a close friend
Definitely not a boyfriend
Hadn't thought of him in ages
Looked him up on Facebook
His background photo shows mice
So does his portrait photo.
Mice!
Mice everywhere.
Hand built castles for mice
with tiny arched doorways,
and meticulously designed
little napping...
#animals
#friendship
#LifeStruggles #surreal
#LifeStruggles #surreal
122 reads
6 Comments
UbiquitousVoid
Poem Published
23rd Jun 2024 6:28pm
23rd Jun 2024 6:28pm
TO RENEW
To reflect on this
Serendipitous
Crushed flowers, the wind a spear
Carried to forsaken doorsteps
A light in the sky
Artificial sun
And a closing eye
For yesterday has died
A stone's throw away
Inundation of true bliss
Serendipitous
A carmine streak
A poignant hue
To some, a river of blood
But it beckons me back
To greater misfortunes
I paint not with pigment
My landscapes are of the mind
A crescendo of words
To ease an appetite
May...
Serendipitous
Crushed flowers, the wind a spear
Carried to forsaken doorsteps
A light in the sky
Artificial sun
And a closing eye
For yesterday has died
A stone's throw away
Inundation of true bliss
Serendipitous
A carmine streak
A poignant hue
To some, a river of blood
But it beckons me back
To greater misfortunes
I paint not with pigment
My landscapes are of the mind
A crescendo of words
To ease an appetite
May...
#hope
#PowerOfWords
#surreal
170 reads
0 Comments
gothicsurrealism
Daniel Long
Daniel Long
Poem Published
14th Jun 2024 7:42pm
14th Jun 2024 7:42pm
Intoxicated
I possess an illness,
an addiction to your drug.
A sip of rose wine
and conversation intoxicates me,
and I am left craving
the petals of your rose.
Symptoms of loneliness
and the longing for you,
I have no regrets
for my addiction to you.
Your beauty is thus a drug!
Let’s impregnate this idea of us!
an addiction to your drug.
A sip of rose wine
and conversation intoxicates me,
and I am left craving
the petals of your rose.
Symptoms of loneliness
and the longing for you,
I have no regrets
for my addiction to you.
Your beauty is thus a drug!
Let’s impregnate this idea of us!
#addiction
#bipolar
#dark
#MentalHealth
#surreal
336 reads
5 Comments
gothicsurrealism
Daniel Long
Daniel Long
Poem Published
5th Jun 2024 8:13am
5th Jun 2024 8:13am
Traumatically Windblown
Psychosis carried in the gales,
for I am surely windblown,
windward from my own psyche,
where boundaries of reality have eroded.
With concealed hands,
a nonvisual hallucination caresses
the encasement of my soul,
provoking verbal responses.
Nothingness which wreathes around me,
a curve in a state of nonexistence
meandering around my body.
The compass of my soul spins.
Following the scent of nothing,
I steer into my own deception -
into an opaque fog,
distorting my perception.
Blind...
for I am surely windblown,
windward from my own psyche,
where boundaries of reality have eroded.
With concealed hands,
a nonvisual hallucination caresses
the encasement of my soul,
provoking verbal responses.
Nothingness which wreathes around me,
a curve in a state of nonexistence
meandering around my body.
The compass of my soul spins.
Following the scent of nothing,
I steer into my own deception -
into an opaque fog,
distorting my perception.
Blind...
#bipolar
#depression
#MentalHealth
#sadness
#surreal
314 reads
8 Comments
gothicsurrealism
Daniel Long
Daniel Long
Poem Published
1st Jun 2024 10:25pm
1st Jun 2024 10:25pm
Into a Surrealist’s Utopia
Part 1
The Realm of Realism (Life in a Tomb)
The Path of Uncertainty
I know this path. This is a path that I’ve walked before. It’s a dark one with an indeterminate end. Me, myself and I think there are some things that are just kept better quiet. I don’t want to be quiet anymore. I want to leave this arctic realm of realism, lower my foot into the warm bath water of surrealism, and be home! Here, I am no one. There, I am someone. Oh, how I hate gazing into the mirror. May as well be prison bars between my Utopian realm and this one. I’ll raise my hand to...
The Realm of Realism (Life in a Tomb)
The Path of Uncertainty
I know this path. This is a path that I’ve walked before. It’s a dark one with an indeterminate end. Me, myself and I think there are some things that are just kept better quiet. I don’t want to be quiet anymore. I want to leave this arctic realm of realism, lower my foot into the warm bath water of surrealism, and be home! Here, I am no one. There, I am someone. Oh, how I hate gazing into the mirror. May as well be prison bars between my Utopian realm and this one. I’ll raise my hand to...
#MentalHealth
#surreal
200 reads
1 Comment
Kinkwizard_95
Poem Published
2nd May 2024 10:59pm
2nd May 2024 10:59pm
Melodies in my mind
Let me take you on a journey
Through music, space and time
From acid house to jungle
I plan to break your mind
Can you feel that bass line
Can you feel this beat
All these musical implements
Make me move with heat
Let me spin a lyric
Let me loose inside the rhyme
Play me all your breaks and boogies
From jazz, rock unto grime
Now let me take you through the score
Treble clef, to bass beyond
Sounds and rhythms ring in your ears
Yet where do they belong
Cry out the chords to...
Through music, space and time
From acid house to jungle
I plan to break your mind
Can you feel that bass line
Can you feel this beat
All these musical implements
Make me move with heat
Let me spin a lyric
Let me loose inside the rhyme
Play me all your breaks and boogies
From jazz, rock unto grime
Now let me take you through the score
Treble clef, to bass beyond
Sounds and rhythms ring in your ears
Yet where do they belong
Cry out the chords to...
#lyrics
#music
#myself
#spiritual
#surreal
238 reads
3 Comments
Kinkwizard_95
Poem Published
27th Apr 2024 7:28pm
27th Apr 2024 7:28pm
You’re there but everywhere
You’re there but everywhere
Inside and out
In me, without me
Anywhere I go
You’re here and nowhere
All of the time
Near yet so far away
Present in my mind
Within me, without me
All in one place
Never yet always
Always in this space
In this place
You’re all around me
In this world
I have no doubt
You’re up there
Looking down on me
Everywhere
All the time
These sensations
They grip me
Like a vice
Grasped so tight
An inclination...
Inside and out
In me, without me
Anywhere I go
You’re here and nowhere
All of the time
Near yet so far away
Present in my mind
Within me, without me
All in one place
Never yet always
Always in this space
In this place
You’re all around me
In this world
I have no doubt
You’re up there
Looking down on me
Everywhere
All the time
These sensations
They grip me
Like a vice
Grasped so tight
An inclination...
#death
#emotions
#NaPoWriMo2024 #surreal
#NaPoWriMo2024 #surreal
190 reads
4 Comments
DU Poetry : Surreal Seeking Honest Critique Poems
