deepundergroundpoetry.com
Whip And Chain Me In Verses
You dominate me with your wicked prowess
pissing down my throat
as I swallow your venom filled verses
creamy and wet from the brutality of your words
red welts on my heart shaped ass as your toungue
lashes me with truth
ahhh don't stop now
dig deep Master mind fuck me and bend me to your will
chained to your turn of phrase and over powering ink
as I read you I feel like i'm riding your angry cock
deadly dangerous i'm sore riding your thoughts
to their ending then swallowing the ink you've cum on the page
sated for the moment I can rest my bruised and broken form
pissing down my throat
as I swallow your venom filled verses
creamy and wet from the brutality of your words
red welts on my heart shaped ass as your toungue
lashes me with truth
ahhh don't stop now
dig deep Master mind fuck me and bend me to your will
chained to your turn of phrase and over powering ink
as I read you I feel like i'm riding your angry cock
deadly dangerous i'm sore riding your thoughts
to their ending then swallowing the ink you've cum on the page
sated for the moment I can rest my bruised and broken form
Published 28th Jan 2013
| Edited 25th Feb 2013
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 20
reading list entries 5
comments 32
reads 2108
Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
28th Jan 2013 10:20pm
28th Jan 2013 10:41pm
29th Jan 2013 00:05am
Oh my fucking god, Crim! I love this! Beyond that, I'm speechless at the moment.
Gemini
Gemini
29th Jan 2013 00:20am
29th Jan 2013 00:08am
29th Jan 2013 00:21am
Anonymous
29th Jan 2013 00:24am
Nice write crim...heart-shaped and all!
Strider...!
Strider...!
29th Jan 2013 00:31am
ty Strider smiling..I tried to thumbs up your comment but there is a glitch it won't let me..ty again peace Crim
Anonymous
- Edited 9th Nov 2018 2:45pm
29th Jan 2013 00:27am
<< post removed >>
29th Jan 2013 00:31am
29th Jan 2013 00:43am
always nice to see a writer of such verses thoroughly dominated. your metaphors are as stinging as the whip & sweet as your flowing juices...
29th Jan 2013 8:30pm
29th Jan 2013 3:15am
29th Jan 2013 8:31pm
Anonymous
29th Jan 2013 4:23am
LOVE this :)
"then swallowing the ink you've cum on the page"
F***ing HOT!!!!!!
"then swallowing the ink you've cum on the page"
F***ing HOT!!!!!!
29th Jan 2013 8:32pm
ty Milkyway this writer cums on the page and I swallow every last drip of him lol..peace Crim :)
29th Jan 2013 4:50am
everyone has a Master... it shows through the words that flow from the pen to stain the paper... excellent
29th Jan 2013 8:33pm
29th Jan 2013 6:47am
29th Jan 2013 8:34pm
Anonymous
29th Jan 2013 5:26pm
Crim,
The chain of these verses has left you glowing in all the right places! Loved your second stanza!!!
tornado
The chain of these verses has left you glowing in all the right places! Loved your second stanza!!!
tornado
29th Jan 2013 8:35pm
30th Jan 2013 3:35pm
Indeed, it's good to have someone who stirs your core. AND we get to enjoy the scintillating fruit of your craving.
24th Feb 2013 10:21pm
12th Feb 2013 7:04am
24th Feb 2013 10:22pm
26th Mar 2013 6:18am
WOW!!!...(Whew!)... Speaking of Masters, you've really Mastered this one here Crim!... I think your 'Whip and Chain Me In Verses' is an incredibly good poem, on numerous levels...
It amazes me how much subtle 'power' simple words can have, especeially when conjoined & multi-dimensionally alligned, in such a keenly observed, well evolved, fearlessly inspired & deeply intuited, playful way!...
Yet just beneath & throughout, the experiential (& lucidly vicarious too!), open-wounded flesh, of inner more than outer pain, I hear, sense, intuit & feel here within the evenly balanced, wonderfully metaphoric weave of your very remarkable, juxtapositionally envisioned poem, I suspect an even deeper, unseen ocean current of both inner & outer, equally pulsating, creative beauty as well (even if, perhaps, intentionally masked & partially hidden via some of your darker poems!), nonetheless, is still just as poetically flowing, more quietly & humbly through your gifted veins of brighter being & vision too!... Sorry, I know... I've often been told, I tend to use way too many run-on adjectives (in my much too long response comments & in my poetry as well, but honestly here (at least in regards to your poem), sometimes only one or two & even more at times (with or without moderation), just wont do sufficient justice, as is the case with your very cool, highly clever & openly bold, 'literally erotic' (referential, metaphoric pun intended!), poem here!... A fantastic piece of startling word-craft... you should be quite proud of this one!... "Keep em comin Crim & thanks again for the adrenalating, blood-stirring rush, of a really good read!... ~ O.I.N.
It amazes me how much subtle 'power' simple words can have, especeially when conjoined & multi-dimensionally alligned, in such a keenly observed, well evolved, fearlessly inspired & deeply intuited, playful way!...
Yet just beneath & throughout, the experiential (& lucidly vicarious too!), open-wounded flesh, of inner more than outer pain, I hear, sense, intuit & feel here within the evenly balanced, wonderfully metaphoric weave of your very remarkable, juxtapositionally envisioned poem, I suspect an even deeper, unseen ocean current of both inner & outer, equally pulsating, creative beauty as well (even if, perhaps, intentionally masked & partially hidden via some of your darker poems!), nonetheless, is still just as poetically flowing, more quietly & humbly through your gifted veins of brighter being & vision too!... Sorry, I know... I've often been told, I tend to use way too many run-on adjectives (in my much too long response comments & in my poetry as well, but honestly here (at least in regards to your poem), sometimes only one or two & even more at times (with or without moderation), just wont do sufficient justice, as is the case with your very cool, highly clever & openly bold, 'literally erotic' (referential, metaphoric pun intended!), poem here!... A fantastic piece of startling word-craft... you should be quite proud of this one!... "Keep em comin Crim & thanks again for the adrenalating, blood-stirring rush, of a really good read!... ~ O.I.N.
26th Mar 2013 10:07pm
This is by far the best critique i've ever had thank you so much..I'm glad the poem touched you in such a way..wishing you peace Crim
8th Apr 2013 11:13pm
Is the poem about sexual fantasy, inspiration, the act of intercourse or the teasing of though through a pen? In this short poem, you have manage to bombard me with sexual imagery that is inspiring me to writing my own erotica plus the sense of the overwhelming desire that a muse can provoke within you (or me while you write!) The quick edge shot of adrenalin makes you want more but you know that you wont be able to take it for much longer!
Thank you for the roller coaster ride of a life time.
Thank you for the roller coaster ride of a life time.
9th Apr 2013 1:29am
Yes for me it was a poet with his verses who inspired such thoughts..I'm glad I could do so for you as well..peace Crim :)
24th May 2019 5:48pm
24th May 2019 5:49pm
