fucking it away

What do you want?
I want to feel something
You think I can make you feel something?
Yeah, I think you can make me feel something
… or are you just going to stand there in your underwear and tease me?


It’s the feeling of tongues in mouths and my shirt being pulled off
being forced back on to the bed
it’s the slide of fingers into wet hot places and a gasp emitted from my lips
my body responding as it’s meant to

It’s the grapple for bra straps in an effort to get more naked
and feel the weight and heat of a body against mine

It’s the forgetting of names and unspoken desires being played out
in a sordid one night stand with some woman I picked up at a club

It’s licks and bites and screams and the giving over of power
just for a second so I can feel and forget that right here, right now
I hate my life

It’s the pulling on of clothes afterwards and a post fuck cigarette
feeling some kind of shame that I gave in again
to the most basic need of touch
as though I am above sexual desire and the pleasure a mouth can give me
whether it’s somewhere between my open legs
to the caress of a tongue in my mouth telling me that I’m desirable
and that for just this moment
everything is okay, and that at least for tonight
maybe I can fuck the pain away

© Indie Adams 2012