Yarmulke Pt 2  (in the voice of L David, S  Silverman, H Stern, W Allen etc)

y`all should know that the average Jewish Person is about as similar to an Orthodox Jew as a Wall-Street Methodist is to a buggy-rollin` Amish Farmer.  
 
The always-in-style Yarmulke also      
serves as a boost of Self-Confidence      
for us males of The Chosen People in      
the globally anti-semitic Present      
(Past AND Future, oy..)      
      
When a Hasid dons his kippah,      
he not only shows pious adherence      
to Jewish law,      
he also has the confidence    
that no one realizes    
he`s balding.      
      
It creates the same      
advantage of mental edge      
of the much more expensive,      
exquisitely painful,      
and downright risky      
penile enlargement surgury.    
      
(again with the alteration of the Penis?)      
      
      
The Jewish population has always      
been a tiny minority amongst peoples      
of this earth.      
   
(Hey---You, yes YOU in the back,      
I HEARD that sigh of relief!)      
      
We have survived for 5773 years      
by STRICTLY adhering to the Hebrew      
Letter of Tanakh --- LITERALLY "The Law".      
      
Pompous, vain Orthodox Jews with luxurious,    
flowing full heads of hair who let things slide,      
and break LAW by getting caught in public without      
their Yarmulkes are shamed and threatened      
by their fellows. They are  told that they better NOT      
"get with the pogrom"    
   
------------------------------------------  
   
G*D of    
my Fathers  
Forgive me.........