A very random afternoon

The waitress asked me how I liked my eggs,
I said deeper, darker more evil
she looked at me  
I then grabbed the salt shaker
put it in my pocket and left
the waitress threw her arms up
I laughed as i exited
 
as I walked down the street  
I threw salt over my shoulder
I gave the shaker to a friendly bum
I kept moving down the street
looking into everyone's eyes crazily  
trying to get a rise
nothing
 
I went into this hipster type coffee house
I ordered black
when it arrived I said I wanted cream and sugar
the coffee dude wrinkled his nose
the guy next to me left his journal when he went to the lav
I took it, drew a dick and balls  
and wrote ~you know you love me~, I signed it Nikkimoe
smiling big I left
 
I walked down the street with my sunglasses on
this time avoiding the eyes of the passerby's
there a record store on my left
that's where I'm heading to next  
laptop deejays suck, real ladies want 12inches  
vinyl
I burst through their door with the same big smile  
 
looking around for like an hour
the guy asks if I need help
help with what, I ask with a major attitude  
he turns around and walks away
I take a record up to the counter
he rings me up, magically I have absolutely no cash
I tell they guy I lost my money in the store
we look for it for 30min  
then I say he stole it and storm out  
laughing when I reach the street
 
smiling all the way back to my car!
 
there isn't a reason in the world for my actions
except maybe I wanted to give people something to talk about
mix up their boring life(I'm assuming its boring), while making mine more interesting
             ~~Life is what you make it~~