Recovery Relapse

I SIT & WONDER HOW I GET 4RM THERE 2 HERE, ZONING OUT IN A BLANK STARE, NO CARE NO FEAR, TRYNA PREVENT 4RM SHEDDIN A TEAR, XPLORIN THIS MAZE DHAT I CALL MY MIND, NO TYME 2 UNWIND, YEARNIN 2 FIND, SUMTHING I LOST N MY PAST NO SO FAR BEHIND, MOVIN 4WRD YET STUCK ON REWIND, DETERMINED 2 SEPERATE MY WRONG 4RM DHA RIGHT, STRUGGLIN N THIS ENDLESS FIGHT, UP SCRATCHN MY HEAD ALL NIGHT, NO VISIONZ IN SIGHT, SHIELDED N DHA DARK REACHIN 4 DHA LIGHT, WHICH HAPPENZ 2 B MY ULTIMATE HORROR MY ULTIMATE FRIGHT, I KNW IMA KING BUT IDK WHERE I BLONG, URKN 2 DO GOOD N XSAPE MY WRONG, & B RELIEVED 4RM LYFE'S SAD HARSH SONG, TOOMY IS MY NAME LOVE LIVE LYFE IS MY GAME, NO LNGER HOLD MY HEAD DWN N SHAME, REFUSIN 2 B TAME, FIRE BURNIN YEAH I LIT DHA FLAME, HURT BY MY OWN PAIN, CAUSED DHA RAIN, CALLED KRAZY MAD & INSANE, YET STILL NOW IM LIFTN DHAT DRAIN, REBORN N STARTN A NEW LYFE, REBUKIN ANYTHING DHAT SEEMZ ILLMATICLY TWYFE, KNOWLEDGE IM SHARPENING LYKE A MASSACHETTE KNIFE, DIVORCED DHA HOOD OFFICALLY MADE GOD MY LYFE MY WYFE, CAUSE HIS LOVE IS BREATHE TAKIN, GOTTA WHIFF OF DHA HOLYGHOST NOW MY BODY IS SHAKIN, & DHATZ NO FAKIN, JUST HISTORY N DHA MAKIN, SMILIN HUMMN N SMIRKN, NO POUT NO MOAN NO GRIEVE, FINALLY I FEEL RELIEVE, CAUSE ONCE AGAIN N GOD I BELIEVE, 4 HE GAVE ME FLOW, WHICH I PROUDLY SHOW, DHATZ 1 DAY GONNA MAKE ME BLOW, HAHA I LAUGH CAUSE NOW SMILIN CAUSE NOW I GLOW, SO 1STEP @ A TYME I'LL B BACK WIT SOME MO, GRINNIN FEELN SLY, OH SO FLY, NOT AFRAID 2 CRY,SUMTHING LYKE HONEST ABE REFUSIN 2 TELL A LIE, CHU MY DUECES UP TELLN DHA STREETZ BYE BYE, CAUSE LYKE I SAID B4 I MAY NOT KNW WHERE I BLONG BUT OH YES IMA KING, & ITZ AMEN DHAT I SING, WEARIN DHA PURITY HOLY RING, SHININ BRIGHTER THEN EVA W/O ROCKN ANY BLING