You're not sorry.

Calling yourself a fucking asshole doesn't make it okay.
And yeah, I know you're not sorry.
If you really felt bad you would not have kept doing it.
Don't lie to me you little shit, I know your not sorry.

I said I can't.
You kept pushing and pushing.
You told me to give in.
I wished you away. I felt like nothing.

That's what I think of myself,
I am nothing.
I should not have let the happen.
I tried to stop it.

I tried to push you away.
You are strong, and my body was giving.
I feel disgusting. I need to tell her.
How do I tell her you were so unforgiving?

Maybe I should keep this to myself.
I don't want to start drama within our friends.
So, this is the consequence I bare.
It eats away at me while I pretend it never happened.

Who would believe me, anyway?
That doesn't sound like him at all.
I'll just sit in silence.
Lock myself inside my walls.

I feel low. I feel sick.
I'm so sexually driven.
I hate my stupid eating disorder.
It leaves me craving attention.

That's a lie, it's not attention I want.
I only ever want physical approval.
So what am I waiting for?
Let's start the process of removal.

Sadly, I'll never be recovered,
But in constant recovery.
I have days where I'm off my game,
Days when it just takes over me.

I kind of enjoy mild sexual harassment.
To a small extent.
But not like that, not like last night.
You did not have my consent.

"I can't," I said. I don't feel right.
You're still in love.
She's my best friend. I won't do this to her.
God help me, I pray for help from above.

I didn't want to.
You kept kissing me.
I can't do this, I can't.
Please let me be.

You touched me, you sucked me,
I tried to break free.
But you were too strong.
I couldn't push hard enough...

It finally ended.
You kept touching me through the night.
I kept swatting you away.
I said no. I said stop. No means no, right?

No means yes. Yes means anal.
I can't believe you guys joke like that.
Did you really think I meant yes?
I don't want to see you, not after that.