To My Two Little Kings

I know you wonder.
I know you ask, in whispers or in silence,
"Why did Mama leave?"
"Why couldn’t she take us too?"
Let me tell you, my loves...I never left you.
I just had to find a way to live.
Seventeen years, I fought.
Fought for love, for family, for a home
that no longer held me.
The walls got too tight,
the air too thin,
and if I stayed, I would have disappeared.
And what good is a mother who is only a shadow?
I left you with him...not because I wanted to,
but because I had to trust the man
who once swore to be better than the father he never had.
I prayed he’d show you what I couldn’t,
that his hands would build you strong,
that his lessons would make you wise.
But don’t ever think for a second
that my heart isn’t wrapped around you.
That my spirit isn’t covering you.
That every dollar I scraped, every mile I traveled,
wasn’t just to share moments with you.
To remind you that Mama is always here.
Closer than your breath,
louder than your heartbeat in the quiet of the night.
See, God called me to freedom.
To a place where I could breathe,
where my purpose could rise like the sun over the ocean.
And in that calling, I had to trust—
trust that you would see me,
not as a woman who ran,
but as a mother who chose strength.
I chose a future for you, my sons,
not built on struggle, but on victory.
Not bound in pain, but in power.
Because I refuse to let you inherit a cycle
of silent suffering and shackled dreams.
You were born for greatness.
You were made to stand tall.
And though my hands aren’t there to tuck you in every night,
my prayers are woven into your dreams,
my love is stitched into your soul.
One day, you will understand.
One day, you will look back and see
that Mama was never weak.
She was fearless. She was brave.
She trusted in God’s plan,
so you could walk in His light.
And your father? He is growing too.
We all are.
Because love doesn’t lose.
Love always wins.
And God? He always makes a way.
So walk, my sons—walk with courage,
walk with pride,
walk knowing that you are the reason I rise,
that you are the reason I fight,
that you are the reason I know—
we were never meant to break.
I love you forever,
Mama.