Shifting

The relentless search for answers      
Not giving up the fight      
Not. Giving. Up.      
     
When is enough, enough?      
That was his question      
While he looked intently into my eyes      
Kindness, compassion, concern      
Stamped across his face    
     
The loss of my core self, who I am      
My identity has always been fragmented      
My beliefs, my values      
How I perceive my own thoughts      
All of it      
Constantly shifts unbeknownst to me      
Until after the fact    
     
Just that question      
Just that moment was enough      
For me    
     
My psychiatrist was correct      
We treat the symptoms      
Not the diagnosis      
     
I am not my diagnosis      
I never was      
     
I’ll probably forget      
I usually do      
But one thing I don’t forget to do?      
     
I. Never. Give. Up.      
     
     
     
     
     
* Here’s your history lesson, because the authors’s notes section is too limited:      
     
In the context of Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD), "shifting identity" refers to a core symptom called "identity disturbance," where a person experiences a fluctuating and inconsistent sense of self, often feeling like they are different people depending on the situation or who they are with, leading to significant difficulties in maintaining stable relationships and a consistent self-image; essentially, their identity can seem to "shift" depending on the context.      
     
Why does identity shifting happen in BPD?      
Childhood trauma:      
Research suggests that experiences of childhood abuse or neglect can contribute to the development of an unstable sense of self in BPD.      
Difficulty with self-reflection:      
Individuals with BPD may struggle to accurately perceive and integrate their own thoughts, feelings, and experiences, leading to a fragmented sense of self.      
Coping mechanism:      
Sometimes, identity shifts can be a way of adapting to stressful situations by adopting different roles or behaviors to please others.      
     
Key points:      
Manifestations:      
People with BPD might experience rapid changes in their beliefs, values, goals, and behaviors depending on the situation, making it seem like they are "acting" different roles.      
Impact on relationships:      
This inconsistency can lead to difficulties in maintaining relationships as others may struggle to understand or trust the person with BPD.      
Not multiple personalities:      
While identity shifting in BPD can feel like having multiple personalities, it is crucial to distinguish it from Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID) where distinct, separate alters exist.