The Friendly Abductor

Get in the car please
No not in the seat, in the trunk
Oh I'm terribly sorry
Where's my manners
I'll open that for you
Comfy now?
Good
I'll move those items over for you
Yes, that's right, that's a sledgehammer, a shovel, an axe and a hunting knife
Don't worry, once we arrive to our destination,
I will bludgeon you, chop you up and throw you into a shallow grave
I promise, you won't feel a thing
Enjoy the ride
SLAM!