Shovelling Snow.

You will never truly understand her. She is a somebody but to her she has been six feet under it’s almost living in reverse .It all began this feeling when she was five and she remembers the first time she saw another human being physically hurt by another. Namely her mother and the thing is this sort of living spreads like a virus and it infiltrates and annihilates all the wonder and destroys joy until you don’t think you can take much more but you do.

As life is a gift she isn’t a total degenerate and you have to unwrap it and take it in your own hands and find an alternative reality it’s found in books, they get her hooked and by the grace of God she didn’t pick up a needle or a bottle to ease the pain. She is astute and grew up much quicker than her peers but the one thing missing is the bows and the ribbons she just doesn’t feel like you do but she learnt to survive in disguise.

Although in reality when she is on her own, she is always shovelling snow even in the summertime and waiting on the next avalanche. Before you judge her for her abysmal attitude, she already knows that’s not right but one thing for an absolute certainty she won’t fight and leave you with your own perspectives. Deep down she just wants everyone and everything to feel alright regardless of differences because she knows all about that internalised over time.

She knows you are gifted many things in your lifetime, but it doesn’t necessarily mean that you wanted them or asked for them. Somethings are beyond your control until control is all you know, and shovelling snow is a metaphorical oxymoron for her a friendly fight within her life and on she goes.