deepundergroundpoetry.com
Chatroom
Your chatroom, so whack, dude.
The fact proves, its mask dues.
Detached views, abstract rules.
Attach loose, and latch to.
A bad mood distracts zoom.
Go back through, enact stoop.
Vernacular value
in vacuum, is vast blues.
Come battle, bedazzled.
Unshackling, black brooms.
Foreshadowing, cast cruel,
for stature and straddle.
Are cattle that axe proof?
This vascular tract moves.
No matter of angles
can capture wit's fangle.
As platitude, ask Zule.
Immaculate, mad Zeus.
Has hazardous haggle
inhabited hacks, too?
If masculine max moots,
some actual wrangle.
For Saturn comes past moons,
when waxing, collapsed, full.
Their CAPS glue such craft coup.
Sin factors but badged tombs.
Mixed masseuse text tangles,
fits laughing dismantles.
Tip tragedy, rag roots.
Encapsuled amalgam.
Shall shattering tact choose?
Relapsing, who's lax, truth.
The fact proves, its mask dues.
Detached views, abstract rules.
Attach loose, and latch to.
A bad mood distracts zoom.
Go back through, enact stoop.
Vernacular value
in vacuum, is vast blues.
Come battle, bedazzled.
Unshackling, black brooms.
Foreshadowing, cast cruel,
for stature and straddle.
Are cattle that axe proof?
This vascular tract moves.
No matter of angles
can capture wit's fangle.
As platitude, ask Zule.
Immaculate, mad Zeus.
Has hazardous haggle
inhabited hacks, too?
If masculine max moots,
some actual wrangle.
For Saturn comes past moons,
when waxing, collapsed, full.
Their CAPS glue such craft coup.
Sin factors but badged tombs.
Mixed masseuse text tangles,
fits laughing dismantles.
Tip tragedy, rag roots.
Encapsuled amalgam.
Shall shattering tact choose?
Relapsing, who's lax, truth.
Published 7th Oct 2023
Author's Note
Just some vented frustration of mine from seeing the stupidity in internet chatrooms and on message boards. Such useful things could be better in moral principle. The potential for a community is there, but there's too much pride and sin in the world to be responsible for such technological advance. That's why the madness is so rampant. Anyway, it's still a great blessing to use such things as a tool of observation, though, and to hone your skills as a writer. Let me know what you think, or if you relate, even if just on this message board!
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
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7th Oct 2023 10:27am
I have to say I've never been in a chatroom in my life, lol. I don't know if DUP is considered chat, but this is my first time. Just never appealed to me, some reasons you mentioned. I really like the way you did the rhyme here.
I enjoyed your very observant piece.
I enjoyed your very observant piece.
Admittedly, it's not nearly my best. The cadence and inflection of the rhyme scheme has a nice aesthetic to it, but some of the definition could be crisper and clearer. The choice of how I group the words could be easier to understand, rather than so abstract. There's some originality to it, I guess. I enjoy the challenge of being metaphorical and visual too, and some of that is there, but again, it's just sloppy for me. It does have a sense of direction, theme, and transition, but that could be better as well. The topic itself is kind of a hypocritical disposition for me, in that I know the crap that's in those chatrooms and on those message boards but continue to use them. i guess I'm kind of venting frustration, or at least, that could be one take on it. There is some truth to it, in that chatrooms are that ugly., You're better off not to try to belong to such a community, ha-ha. Anyway, thanks for checking it out. I'll see you around.
7th Oct 2023 1:01pm
This brought me back to the days of AIM. Facebook is the new chat which is worse because everyone is in a group now spreading their absurdity. Great write.
7th Oct 2023 1:40pm
I almost have to laugh in relation and agreement. Thanks for the comment and checking it out.
7th Oct 2023 3:10pm
7th Oct 2023 4:18pm
That's some of the issue with chatrooms - it's like a bar, in some ways. I'm not so sure many people have found peace in their bedrooms that chat. I suppose some have, but many act out lust and covetousness. I don't want to get into the ugly details, but yeah, you're better off to spare yourself from chat, ha-ha.
